Series premiere review: 'Beauty and the Beast' - 'Pilot': Look away! I'm HIDEOUS!
If "Beauty and the Beast" isn't the worst new show of the fall (and it probably is, and Fienberg definitely thinks it is), it's certainly the silliest. It's the kind of show that justifies every horrible stereotype and joke about Hollywood executives. Of course the CW would do a version of "Beauty and the Beast" (specifically, remaking the '80s Ron Perlman/Linda Hamilton CBS series) in which the "beast" is an incredible hunk who just happens to have a scar on his face. The CW's target demo doesn't want to watch ugly people. Duh.
The producers have tried to spin it as Jay Ryan being beastly in less superficial ways: He has a temper! He's damaged from his time in the military and this weird experiment! Lana Lang just can't resist him, even though he's bad for her! But it's all just goofy, Ryan is wooden, Kristin Kreuk is hilariously miscast as a tough New York cop, and after about five minutes of laughing at the absurdity of it all, I found "Beauty and the Beast" committing the worst TV sin of all: it was boring.
For those of you who watched tonight, what did you think? One and done, or time to set the DVR season pass?
1982 | Fantasy | GSummary: Animated fantasy about a brave unicorn who, fearful that she’s the last of her kind, goes in search of the other unicorns, which were spirited away to the ends of the Earth.Director: Jules Bass, Arthur Rankin Jr.
Cast: Jeff Bridges, Mia Farrow, Angela Lansbury
1937 | Drama | GSummary: Heidi is orphaned and her selfish maternal Aunt Dete takes her to the mountains to live with her grumpy old paternal grandfather, Adolph Kramer. Heidi brings her grandfather back into mountain society...through her angelic ways and sheer love. When Aunt Dete steals Heidi away to be the companion ...Director: Allan Dwan
Cast: Shirley Temple, Jean Hersholt, Arthur Treacher, Helen Westley
2002 | Thriller | RSummary: A cop with a shady past investigates a murder in Alaska, but when his partner is gunned down during a manhunt, things get really murky. Al Pacino stars, and Robin Williams delivers one of his darkest performances.Director: Christopher Nolan
Cast: Al Pacino, Hilary Swank, Robin Williams
2009 | Comedy | NRSummary: The US President and the UK Prime Minister are looking to launch a war in the Middle East. The plot follows government officials and advisers in their behind-the-scenes efforts either to promote the war or prevent it. Spinal Tap meets Strangelove. A satirical demolition of Whitehall and Washingto...Director: Armando Iannucci
Cast: Peter Capaldi, Tom Hollander, Gina McKee, James Gandolfini
2011 | Drama | RSummary: A queasy, weird tale of two guys who dream of surviving the apocalypse who are tested when they encounter something their homemade car and flamethrowers can't handle: love.Director: Evan Glodell
Cast: Evan Glodell, Tyler Dawson, Jessie Wiseman
2007 | Drama | TV-14Summary: One of the best shows ever to air on television explores the origins of modern advertising, sexual relationships and social structures, with star-making turns from Jon Hamm, Elisabeth Moss, and Christina Hendricks.Director: Matthew Weiner (creator)
Cast: Jon Hamm, Elisabeth Moss, Vincent Kartheiser, January Jones, Christina Hendricks, John Slattery
2001 | Family | PGSummary: The children of a super-spy couple must rescue their parents when mom and dad are targeted by a powerful maniac with dreams of world domination in this clever spin of espionage action.Director: Robert Rodriguez
Cast: Alexa PenaVega, Daryl Sabara, Antonio Banderas
1973 | Horror | PGSummary: Spooky haunted house tale in which a team of paranormal investigators attempts to verify the existence of supernatural spirits by spending a week inside a supposedly haunted mansion.Director: John Hough
Cast: Roddy McDowall, Gayle Hunnicutt, Pamela Franklin
1937 | War | NRSummary: During World War I, two French officers concoct a plan to escape the German POW camp in which they are confined. When they are transferred to a far more secure location, they must revise their plan, which now poses infinitely greater risk.Director: Jean Renoir
Cast: Jean Gabin, Dita Parlo, Pierre Fresnay
Let Streaming Genie help you.