Real Housewives

Real Housewives of New Jersey

Jun 02, 2013

We have said it before, and we'll say it again, there is something special about chair-throwing "Real Housewives of New Jersey" goodness.  We know that "New Jersey" isn't the original flavor of the franchise, but in our world it is one of the five best.  We ask you, what is it about New Jersey (the place) and the hair and the clothes and everything else that make it so enjoyable to watch?  What, you don't agree?  Check out Teresa and Caroline and everyone else tonight and see for yourself if "Real Housewives of New Jersey" isn't just a fantastic edition of the franchise.  Season five gets going tonight which makes it the perfect time to start watching.

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Real Housewives of Atlanta

Apr 28, 2013

We told you last week that we were vaguely amazed by the fact that they have managed to extend these "Real Housewives" episodes with four different specials once the main season ends.  We remain just as impressed this week which, we're told, will feature that 'secrets revealed' episode.  We don't know why these secrets weren't revealed during any of the three reunion specials, but seemingly they weren't.  Maybe next year if they go up to seven reunion specials they'll nix the secrets revealed one.  We shall see, but in the mean time, secrets will be revealed tonight.

The Real Housewives of Atlanta

Apr 21, 2013

This is the third part of "The Real Housewives of Atlanta" reunion special (we know, we know, we were wrong about when the reunion was starting, but we're right about this... we promise).  Expect the usual sort of reunion shenanigans tonight and perhaps a little bit of filler.  You know, we really look forward to the moment when there are more reunion/secrets revealed episodes than there are regular ones in a "Housewives" season.  Listen, this season was 20 episodes long and there are a total of four reunion/secrets revealed episodes on top of that.  That makes the entire thing 20% longer than it otherwise would be.  That is a lot.

Real Housewives of Orange County

Apr 01, 2013

Back in March of 2006, a little show called "The Real Housewives of Orange County" premiered, it had something to do with giving us an actual look at the way housewives in said county lived as we had seen on "Desperate Housewives" the fake way.  Now, we aren't going to tell you that what we see on Bravo's "Housewives" is the reality of what takes place in Orange County, but it is certainly exceptionally fun to watch.  It is so fun in fact that there are now goodness knows how many spinoffs, but this one, this one is the original one.  Tune in and see what the housewives are up to as season eight opens.

Real Housewives of Atlanta

Mar 31, 2013

Tonight's "Real Housewives of Atlanta" episode is the last one prior to the 12,000 part reunion that will begin next weekend.  We kid and we will therefore return to the salient point -- the final episode of the main part of the season is tonight.  Will it feature NeNe during something to promote one of her other endeavors?  Will Kandi talk about her other Bravo show?  What will we learn about the women that we didn't know before?  Will a table be flipped?  We shall find out this evening.

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Mar 25, 2013

This is going to be a big night for the housewives of Beverly Hills.  Not only are we getting the last episode of the season, we're also getting the first episode of the reunion.  That is a double dose of housewife-y goodness.  It is like Bergdorf's having a buy one get one free sale, not that a real housewife would ever--ever--wait for a sale in order to buy what they want, no matter how ridiculous the purchase might be.  The real question though is not what the housewives are going to be buying, but what they're going to be selling... to us.

The Real Housewives of Miami

Dec 27, 2012

Last week, as we are quite sure you will remember, we said that you had to watch the finale so that you could understand the reunion.  Now that the reunion is here, we ask you, do you want to waste all that finale watching you did last week?  Come on now, you're prepared, you've done your homework, you're ready for this test, tune in and get it done.  You know that you're just dying to find out all about that lingerie party and what really happened.  Maybe they'll talk about it.  It is going to be one of those freewheeling things, we'll all just have to see what happens.

The Real Housewives of Miami

Dec 20, 2012

Okay, yes, it's true, there's going to be a reunion or two or three following tonight's 'finale,' but that's not really relevant, is it?  No, the important thing to recognize is that as awesome as those specials are, what happens in the finale leads to those specials.  How can you possibly discuss the reunions in any sort of intelligible way if you don't know what happened during the season and if you don't know how the season ended, you don't know what happened during the season, do you?  If you're going to watch the reunions, this is mandatory viewing (and may involve table flipping which just makes it mandatory in general).

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Nov 05, 2012

Tell us the truth, there are moments when watching "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" that you're secretly thinking about "The Beverly Hillbillies," aren't you?  It's okay, we do it too.  We keep waiting for one of them (Maloof?  Richards?  the other Richards?) to bust out a 'cement pond' reference.  No, we don't think of these individuals as hillbillies, but we're hoping for the reference anyway.  As strange as this may sound, it would somehow comfort us.  Maybe we'll get our wish on tonight's third season premiere.  Come on, Vanderpump, throw us a bone.

The Real Housewives of Atlanta

Nov 04, 2012

We would never tell you that all the entries in the "Real Housewives" franchise are exactly the same.  We would never presume to suggest that it is merely the backdrops that change.  We would never offer the opinion that even the arguments are similar.  No, each and every entry in the franchise is its own unique gem to be treasured not just as a part of the bunch, but in its own right.  The new season of the Atlanta version features two new housewives--Kenya Moore and Porsha Stewart--joining the others and we expect them to add to the particular brand of crazy the Atlanta version of "Housewives" offers.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Oct 15, 2012

These reunions are one of our favorite things on television.  There is something great about watching these 'eccentric' women reminisce about all the 'eccentric' things that they did over the course of the season and to have them, potentially recognize just how 'eccentric' said things were.  Or, for them to not recognize just how 'eccentric' their actions were and to full throatedly defend what they did.  See just who admits to having done wrong and who believes themselves to always be right tonight.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey

Oct 14, 2012

As we tell you every single time one of these reunions happen, we love the "Housewives" reunions.  Apparently you do too (and so do the folks at Bravo) because they've expanded this reunion to three parts from the traditional two.  Oh yes, you probably thought that last week's second part was the conclusion, but no, wait, there's more.  How fantastic is that?  How happy are you?  Okay, okay, sit down and breathe.  It's going to be okay, just try to contain yourself.  Watch the reunion tonight and keep those fingers crossed that all the reunions will be three parts in the future.

The Real Housewives of New York City

Oct 01, 2012

We don't really need to tell you what to expect from tonight's episode, do you?  Fine, just in case you're unaware, we'll give you the briefest of explanations.  There will be fighting; the 'real' housewives will fight and argue and complain.  That would be, essentially, the show's raison d'etre, and that would be our raison de watching (or some similar statement.  Next week we'll get the first part of the reunion (followed the week after by the second part), but tonight is the final regular episode of the season, so if you want to know what they're talking about when you watch next week, watch this week.

The Real Housewives of New Jersey

Sep 23, 2012

Don't think of this as goodbye, just think of it as an opportunity for the stars of this series to recharge their batteries and build up a new store of crazy.  They can't possibly continually come up with new crises and challenges and weirdness, they need to take some time, plan out their weirdness, elevate their potential crises into full blown ones, and develop new types of weirdness.  Things will certainly be fully ratcheted up for tonight's finale,  but after this (and maybe some reunion specials), the housewives are going to take some time for themselves.

The Real Housewives of Miami

Sep 13, 2012

Expect the new season of "Real Housewives of Miami" to look moderately different this season than the first season of the spinoff.  We're not suggesting that there won't be hair-pulling and cat-fighting and all the things that makes "Real Housewives" great, rather that some of the focuses from season one are going to be gone and that there are going to be a whole lot of new faces added.  So, tune in and get ready, there are housewives in Miami and they are, we have been informed, real.