"Scandal"

Credit: ABC

I wish Olivia Pope wasn't just a TV character just so I could get some time management pointers from her. She somehow runs a hefty chunk of Washington D.C., manages a staff of gladiators, squeezes in an on-again-off-again affair with the President, takes all of her phone calls while walking quickly from one place to another (that must be her cardio) and always looks fabulous. I feel tired just looking at her, don't you?

On tonight's episode, we determined that Fitz still is being a big baby and can't forgive Olivia for being part of the plan to fix the presidential election. I really think he should just say "Thank you for making me the leader of the free world! XOXO," and maybe send her a nice floral bouquet, but no. Instead, he drunk dials (well, drinking dials) her to tell her she ruined him. Plus, he has his old buddy Jake (Scott Foley) spy on her. I would say Fitz is the ultimate crappy ex, but Olivia still seems miserably, hopelessly and completely in love with him.

Remember, this is even after her yanked her into a dark room for a quickie before informing her he had no intention of rekindling an actual relationship with her traitorous ass (and if anything, he said it more cruelly than that). Sadly, she didn't do what I hoped she would, which was smack him into next week. I don't care if he's the President; that doesn't give him license to act like a smug frat boy who just happens to have the pull to send monkeys or C-list celebrities into space if he really wants to. 

Given how thoroughly competent Olivia is in every other aspect of her life (really, her hair deserves its own Twitter account if it doesn't have one already), I'm finding this ongoing suffering with Fitz less than poetic. Let's look at their history of agony. First, Fitz and Olivia were stymied in their passion by the fact that he's a married, sitting President and she's not his wife. Fine. That made sense. Voters tend not to like that sort of thing, especially when the FLOTUS is hugely pregnant and looks like she should be waving from a parade float. 

But then, he decided the opinion of the American people was no obstacle, having been made crazy brave by surviving a few assassin's bullets. So, then he had to discover Olivia's betrayal. I'm missing a few on and offs in this roller coaster relationship, but really, this is starting to become exhausting. Olivia and Fitz are like those couple friends you think will be pleasant dinner companions, but end up screaming and throwing breadsticks at one another before rolling around in the pasta course while splattering everyone with red sauce, then sticking you with the bill. 

Of course, Olivia is always able to find a convenient parallel between her own life and the B storyline, and this week she represents Sarah Stanner, the happy CEO and mom who just happened to have an affair with Murray Randall, a current Supreme Court nominee, years and years ago. This would have been a nominal speed bump except she and Murray keep leaving out little details like Sarah's daughter possibly being Murray's, which just bugs the hell out of Sarah's husband. 

Because Olivia and her gladiators are all kinds of awesome, they keep Sarah from losing her job and somehow Olivia says just the right thing to make Sarah's husband decide not to open up the paternity test he demanded. Olivia even gives Sarah Zen master guidance on how to deal with betrayal: You can't let it ruin you, and you have to learn to forgive yourself. 

I'm not sure Olivia is really taking her own advice, given how her face squishes up into a little ball of pain every time Fitz gets her on the phone, but fine. I know it would eviscerate the whole show, but part of me would really love for Olivia to truly get over Fitz instead of jumping every time he decides to switch their relationship to on from off. Unfortunately, she seems to be rebounding with Jake, who might actually be more nuts than Fitz (and dangerous to boot). Can't she find a nice, honest guy in Washington D.C.? Oh, wait, did I just type that? Never mind.

In other news, the hostages are saved thanks to Olivia slipping revealing faxes to Jake, Cyrus isn't as in with Fitz as he thinks he is, and Quinn is not shaping up to be the best spy ever, but at least she can distract some guys by taking off her cardigan. 

Do you think Olivia will ever be over Fitz? Does Olivia deserve better? And what do you think Jake is up to? 

Liane Bonin Starr
Sr. Editor

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Liane Bonin Starr is an author, screenwriter and former writer for EW.com. Her byline has appeared in the Los Angeles Times, Variety and a lot of other places. Her last book was called "a scandalously catty, guilty pleasure" by Jane magazine. Expect the same from Starr Raving.