Reality TV Roundup: 'Bachelorette,' Flavor Flav, orgasms and more
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Welcome to Reality TV Roundup -- a quick look at some of the reality TV-centric stories that have recently popped up across the fine, old Interwebs. Click away, my couch potato friends. But before you do...
SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! One more time: SPOILER ALERT. If you watch any competition shows, the latest elimination for each show is probably revealed in the text below. The hope is that, if you missed this week's program and would rather clear out your DVR than watch the episode, you can get a quick hit here. But don't come crying to me if you find out something you didn't want to know. You've been warned. Also note: lots of non-competition reality info lurks below, too.
COMPETITION REALITY SHOWS
"The Bachelorette"'s James talks about protein, Brooks, Superstorm Sandy and science.
This week, the bachelors wear Speedos and hula hoop and stuff. It's cute, kind of.
Meet the new "Big Brother" hamsters! We mean, contestants!
SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE
Meet our top twenty dancers in a tricked up, kinda '80s looking photo gallery!
Here's a recap of the episode in which everyone walks the green mile and some people cry and it's a little sad.
Tim Gunn is going to be hanging out with the judges during the runway show -- and snitching on the designers. We love it!
NON-COMPETITION REALITY TV SHOWS
THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW JERSEY
Caroline's attempt to broker peace between Teresa and Melissa were just a waste of time, it seems, because these women can't even behave themselves at a kiddie birthday party.
Ed Hardy tells us what we already know -- Jon Gosselin helped destroy the brand by wearing it.
Melinda Newman and I debate whether or not anyone is ever on "The Bachelorette" or "The Bachelor" for "the right reasons." We disagree, but I'll say I'm more of a romantic than she is.
Paula Deen gets fired from The Food Network for using racial slurs, and butter lovers and heart surgeons everywhere mourn.
Flavor Flav gets "Couples Therapy" and we learn Joe Francis is just as much of a jerk as we thought he was.
Buzz Aldrin hangs out with the nerds on "The Big Brain Theory: Pure Genius" as they face their final challenge.
Valerie Harper's slow death will be the focus of a TV special. Yeah, keep it classy, NBC.
Nik Wallenda prepares to walk across the Grand Canyon. On a tightrope. Yeah. I'm nervous just thinking about it, aren't you?
Bret Michaels suffers injuries in a Mississipi bus crash. But don't worry. He'll survive to fix your RV!
Okay, that North West baby name thing has to be a joke, right? Apparently her family doesn't dig it, either.
2013 | Drama | RSummary: Leonardo DiCaprio and Jonah Hill have boundless energy in the story of a real-life commodities crook who earned millions through scummy small-time stock trades.Director: Martin Scorsese
Cast: Leonardo DiCaprio, Jonah Hill, Margot Robbie
2013 | Comedy | NRSummary: Insanely funny comedy show created by Amy Schumer, who stars in brilliantly funny sketches about sex, city living, dating, and friendship.Director: Daniel Powell, Amy Schumer (creators)
Cast: Amy Schumer, Kevin Kane, Mike Houston
2008 | Science Fiction | PGSummary: Animated series continues the story of Obi-Wan Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker as they battle the Emperor Palpatine, Count Dooku and General Grievous, but also takes time to explore other smaller characters in the Star Wars universe.Director: George Lucas (creator)
Cast: Tom Kane, Dee Bradley Baker, Matt Lanter
1997 | Crime | RSummary: Quentin Tarantino adaptats an Elmore Leonard novel into this story of a few increasingly desperate people scraping to get by. It has deep soul, a wicked sense of humor, and Samuel L. Jackson, Robert De Niro, Pam Grier, and Robert Forster.Director: Quentin Tarantino
Cast: Pam Grier, Samuel L. Jackson, Robert Forster
1995 | Mystery | NRSummary: Denzel Washington plays an out of work WWII vet who takes the wrong job and is soon neck-deep in a mess of politics, murder, and jazz in '40s Los Angeles.Director: Carl Franklin
Cast: Denzel Washington, Tom Sizemore, Jennifer Beals
1996 | Crime | RSummary: Jerry, a small-town Minnesota car salesman is bursting at the seams with debt... but he's got a plan. He's going to hire two thugs to kidnap his wife in a scheme to collect a hefty ransom from his wealthy father-in-law. It's going to be a snap and nobody's going to get hurt... until people start ...Director: Joel Coen, Ethan Coen
Cast: William H. Macy, Frances McDormand, Steve Buscemi, Peter Stormare
2007 | Comedy | PGSummary: Newlyweds Nick (Ice Cube) and Suzanne (Long) decide to move to the suburbs to provide a better life for their two kids. But their idea of a dream home is disturbed by a contractor (McGinley) with a bizarre approach to business.Director: Steve Carr
Cast: John C. McGinley, Ice Cube, Nia Long, Aleisha Allen
2013 | Thriller | RSummary: Based on the true story of Daniel Lugo (Mark Wahlberg) a Miami bodybuilder who wants to live the American dream. He would like to have the money that other people have. So he enlists the help of fellow bodybuilder Adrian Doorbal (Anthony Mackie) and ex-convict, Christian bodybuilder Paul Doyle (D...Director: Michael Bay
Cast: Mark Wahlberg, Dwayne Johnson, Anthony Mackie, Tony Shalhoub
1993 | Sports | PGSummary: Emotionally powerful sports classic featuring Sean Astin as a skinny high school kid with big football dreams and the determination to make his way towards his dream team at Notre Dame.Director: David Anspaugh
Cast: Sean Astin, Jon Favreau, Ned Beatty
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