Judging from these handsome photos, you'd think Desiree has a wide and varied assortment of potential suitors on this season of "The Bachelorette." Of course, you'd only believe that if you didn't watch the first episode, in which more than a few guys felt comfortable waving their freak flags, dangling room keys and showing up without shirts (or with armor). Welcome to the weirdest season yet!

That being said, more than a few guys show glimmers of promise (and more than a few are just flat-out hot). What will ultimately matter most to Des remains to be seen, but we do know (thanks to this oddball rap video) that a few of the guys aren't in it for the right reasons (to use the guys' favorite phrase) and at least one might be unbalanced (though that's a low estimate).

Des clearly has her work cut out for her, and we can only hope that after sending creepy Jonathan, the trying-too-hard Larry and Nick the magician home, she has sufficiently cleared the field for love. Here's a look at who's left, who has what it takes, and who shouldn't bother to unpack. 

Liane Bonin Starr is an author, screenwriter and former writer for EW.com. Her byline has appeared in the Los Angeles Times, Variety and a lot of other places. Her last book was called "a scandalously catty, guilty pleasure" by Jane magazine. Expect the same from Starr Raving.