"The Vampire Diaries"

Credit: CW

While we've been waiting a few weeks for a new episode of "The Vampire Diaries," tonight's episode is one centered upon a slow story build and, at the end, a few unexpected developments, which is probably about as much as we can handle after a CW-induced dry spell. More importantly, we're treated to flashbacks to 1912, which means retro hair, a flip-flop in Salvatore characteristics (Damon, so sensitive!) and just a little more backstory to keep things interesting. And while some of the seemingly urgent plotlines of recent episodes are back burnered (Rebekah seems to be the only one nervous about that white oak tree), it hardly matters when there's a serial killer loose in Mystic Falls.

 "Project Runway All Stars"

Credit: Lifetime Television

The finale begins! Although it's a little disappointing that not a single woman made it to the end and at least one designer seems determined to make "sexy" outfits that only look good on skinny 15-year-old boys and professional models, I'm still interested to see what this episode holds. I'm hoping that someone can slip Mondo some antidepressants or maybe a bottle of vodka, because if his bad mood doesn't lift soon it's going to be awfully hard to root for him. Funny or not, for the last few episodes he's really been a pain in the ass.  

 "Missing" 

Credit: ABC

While ABC's new show "Missing" (premieres Thurs. March 15 at 8 p.m.) is largely centered around a mom (and former CIA agent, played by Ashley Judd) searching for her son, that doesn't mean there aren't plenty of guys around to flesh out the cast. New Zealand native Cliff Curtis plays Paris-based CIA agent Dax Miller, torn between sympathizing with Judd's character and being pressured by top brass to bring her in, while Adriano Giannini is Becca's old friend and Interpol operative Giancarlo Rossi, determined to help as much as Becca will allow him. Finally, there's the focus of everyone's attention -- Becca's son Michael, played by Nick Eversman. All three of the actors were brought together for a conference call to discuss their very different characters, why prime time means watching your language and why the cool spying angle wasn't what got them on board - and may not be what draws in viewers, either. 

 "Fashion Star"

Credit: NBC

You know that very famous Coco Chanel quote about how a woman should look in the mirror before leaving the house, then take off one accessory? You know, so she looks elegant and not like a crazy homeless person? Someone should have dropped that hint to NBC, because "Fashion Star" is one hot, over-accessorized mess.

The approach to building this TV show seemed to be, if an element worked on another show ("Project Runway," "Biggest Loser"), cram it in! Add a lot of loud music! And some go-go dancers! And some recognizable names! And shopping! And sad stories! And fighting! This show is sort of like a turducken or that "SNL" Taco Town skit (it's 15 great tastes rolled into one!). While it's the American way to want too much of a good thing, this is just a stomachache waiting to happen. 

 "The Bachelor"

Credit: ABC

If the supermarket tabloids are any indication, I've gotten a pretty strong hint about who Ben picks, but hey, you never know with these reality shows. In any case, I'm not overly sure I care too much. Ben has been a uniquely dull bachelor, and I have to think that whoever gets the proposal at the end of the show will wake up the next day, shake her head and say, oh my Lord, I just got engaged to the Geico caveman as voiced by Kermit the Frog. 

 "The Voice"

Credit: NBC

The battle rounds continue, and I can only hope there are some smarter decisions this week than last week. Not that all of the decisions were easy, mind you. I'm still wishing other judges could snap up whoever gets eliminated. Sort of like Go Fish, but with a much better payoff.

"The Real Housewives of Atlanta" 

Credit: Bravo

After the crazy ass catfights that probably put South Africa on NATO's watch list, the ladies of Atlanta seem mostly content to quietly gossip, complain and then gossip some more in this episode. Well, except for two of the players who didn't go to South Africa, who don't have jet lag but do have plenty of venom toward one another, the toxic jet fuel necessary to keep a battle that simply refuses to be resolved ticking -- Peter vs. Mal. If this were a romantic comedy, we'd learn that Peter and Mal actually really love one another, and Peter would ultimately dump Cynthia for her less attractive, pear-shaped sister. But, this not being a rom com, I think it's safe to say these two really hate one another, and poor Cynthia is just going to have to deal with it. 

 "The Bachelor"

Credit: ABC

Welcome to Reality TV Roundup -- a quick look at some of the reality TV-centric stories that have recently popped up across the fine, old Interwebs. Click away, my couch potato friends. But before you do...?

SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! One more time: SPOILER ALERT. If you watch "The X Factor," "Survivor," "Top Chef," "Project Runway," "Celebrity Apprentice" or any other competition shows, the latest elimination for each show is probably revealed in the text below. The hope is that, if you missed this week's program and would rather clear out your DVR than watch the episode, you can get a quick hit here. But don't come crying to me if you find out something you didn't want to know. You've been warned. Also note: lots of non-competition reality info lurks below, too. 

 "The Real Skinny"

Credit: TLC

Now that we have a fleet of TV shows about very large people trying to become much smaller people, it seems that this had to happen -- a show about excess skin removal after extreme weight loss. Despite the playful title, "The Real Skinny" (premieres Mon. March 12 on TLC) is about real people, many of them traumatized by excess hanging skin, undergoing drastic surgery. It's often moving, but you might be forgiven for thinking about Hannibal Lecter when you see gobs of flesh being sliced and diced. Watch a clip from the show below.