Not everyone loves the holidays. There's a reason why suicides spike at this time of year; the lonely feel a little lonelier, fragile relationships crumble. While they may be vampires and hybrids and witches (oh my!), in many ways our Mystic Falls residents are all too human, their problems played out on a larger-than-life scale. This week, more than a few of our intrepid immortals are going to be feeling a lot more isolated and alone, and another relationship is going to hit the skids. Worst of all, we have to wait until Jan. 17 to find out what happens next. Bah, humbug.
Another week, another wacky challenge, and this week is poised to be one of the wackier ones. The designers meet Carolyn at the South Street seaport "Hey, it could be a pirate challenge," thinks Josh as he observes all the ships in the dock. Oh, that would be too easy, too fun. No, it's time for the unconventional challenge, and they will be shopping at one dreadful little mall store that is not Mood. It's not even Michael's. Suffer, minions, suffer!
Fans of the last season's installment of "American Horror Story" may have had to take a moment to recognize returning cast member Dylan McDermott this time around. No longer playing the yuppie therapist Ben Harmon, McDermott goes blue collar to portray the tattooed son of Bloody Face (Zachary Quinto) this season. In a conference call with reporters, McDermott, who says his character is in "the next three of four episodes" and comes face-to-face with his serial killer dad, talked about playing a serial killer, why he doesn't remove his character's tattoos when he goes home, and why he loves "Rosemary's Baby" -- but would never do a remake.
After last week's debacle, during which Tom actually took back the $10,000 prize because all of the food was so consistently lousy, I'm hoping the chefs can turn it around this week. If not, I predict food poisoning, intestinal distress and tears.
For the Quickfire Challenge, the chefs gather around Padma and a little old lady Dallas John thinks might be "Martha Stewart's mother." Alas, she's not. She's Marilyn Hagerty, the food writer for the Grand Forks Herald. She's been writing about middle-American restaurants in her area for 30 years! She recently wrote about the Olive Garden in her fair city, and it went viral (read her review here). She didn't even know what viral meant! Wow!
As one of the judges on "Project Runway All Stars," Marchesa founder Georgina Chapman gets a chance to encourage and (sometimes) humble aspiring designers. Pregnant with her second child, she probably also appreciates the opportunity to sit down for a few hours. During a conference call with journalists, Chapman (who is married to "Project Runway" executive producer Harvey Weinstein) discussed why she decided to take on the show, why she's a fan, and why she signed up for her own special, "Project Runway Spotlight: Marchesa" (airs Thurs. Dec. 20 at 10:00 p.m.)
Could there be anything sweeter than watching a new mom cuddle with her newborn? How about said new mom noting that her kid farts a lot? Then slapping on the make-up to hit the clubs? That's a little more in step with season 2 of "Snooki & JWOWW" (debuting Tues. Jan. 8 at 10:00 p.m.).
During the last installment of "The Bachelorette," earnest Texas Sean Lowe seemed like a shoo-in to win the girl. His down home attitude, wholesome good looks and family focus seemed just right for single mom Emily Maynard. Alas, he got his heart handed back to him and now he returns to the ultimate group date as the newest star of "The Bachelor" on Mon. Jan. 7 at 8:00 p.m. In a conference call with journalists, Lowe talked about taking a second shot at love on national television, the drawbacks of a house full of estrogen, and why he doesn't care if he sees another rose again for as long as he lives.
A few things happen in this episode on "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills," many of them painfully mundane. Kyle gives her terror-behind-the-wheel Alexia a new Mercedes. Ken gets his hip replaced. Lisa reprimands one of her employees. Paul tries to barbecue and shows off his unfortunate back hair. None of this matters, because the focus of this episode is THE FIGHT. Yes, on a show that spews out verbal smackdowns the way Duggars pop out babies, this battle royale might actually be memorable past next week. In fact, I think it continues into next week, as that's the impression we get from the promo, and (thanks to the long, spidery reach of the Internet) it might have been the basis for a cease-and-desist letter against Brandi Glanville filed by Adrienne Maloof. So, whatever kickstarted this feud must have been horrible, right? There's no way of knowing, simply because Bravo didn't air it.
Before we get started, here's a question... What the hell is up with Walter? Kenya is clearly insane, and that's fine. We know why the other women hang out with her -- Bravo makes them -- and she's highly entertaining. Few things are more enjoyable than watching a card-carrying lunatic swan around a reality TV show and annoy all the other slightly-less-loco people on the show. But she's nuts, right? I can understand that Walter finds her attractive; she was a Miss USA (or is that Miss America? Kidding!) She can be charming. But I would think when girlfriend starts yapping about how her baby oven is sad and lonely and how she needs to get married NOW NOW NOW before her ovaries dry up, he'd necessarily run from the room screening, change his cell phone number, and spend a month overseas until she stopped driving past his house, breaking windows. Kenya redefines high maintenance. She makes Mariah Carey look like she could be the chick with uncombed hair checking you through the express lane at Target. What man would willingly sign up for this walking nightmare?
Welcome to Reality TV Roundup -- a quick look at some of the reality TV-centric stories that have recently popped up across the fine, old Interwebs. Click away, my couch potato friends. But before you do...
SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! One more time: SPOILER ALERT. If you watch any competition shows, the latest elimination for each show is probably revealed in the text below. The hope is that, if you missed this week's program and would rather clear out your DVR than watch the episode, you can get a quick hit here. But don't come crying to me if you find out something you didn't want to know. You've been warned. Also note: lots of non-competition reality info lurks below, too.