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1. Taylor Swift: Her new single, “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together,” sets a new record for digital downloads by a female artist selling 623,000 copies. It also sets the record for digital download sales by a wedding crasher.
2. American Idol: If only the actual contest to find the season’s best singer was half as scintillating as the competition to find the new judges.
3. Dee Snider: The Twisted Sister frontman tells Paul Ryan’s campaign to quit using “We’re Not Gonna Take It” on the stump, following Silversun Pickup’s throwing a cease and desist letter at Mitt Romney’s campaign for using “Panic Switch.” On the bright side, the Republicans snag Lynyrd Skynyrd and the Oak Ridge Boys to perform at the convention... if a little tropical storm named Isaac doesn’t ruin the grand old party’s party before then.
4. Psy: the latest viral video sensation is about to hit the mainstream as the South Korean rapper’s “Gangnam Style” will have surpassed 50 million views on YouTube by the time you click here. “Hey sexy lady,” it’s hilarious, silly fun that sounds like it was made in Psy’s bedroom. We feel a new dance craze coming on. Will K-Pop finally explode here?
5. Adele: Within a few weeks, “21”will accomplish the near impossible: surpass 10 million in sales in the U.S. And it may do so without having never fallen out of the top 10 since its release in February 2011. That Adele, she’s such a stage 5 clinger.
6. Muse: British recovered nicely from the round drubbing it rightly received for its awful Olympics track with “Madness,” a subtle turn that shows all is forgiven if you get it right the next time. This time they stick the landing.
7. Bob Marley: The world’s largest dead superstar continues to make news as his “Legends” greatest hits set reaches a new peak on the Billboard 200 28 years after its initial release, climbing to No. 18. One love, one heart.
8. Justin Bieber: The Biebs is headed to Springfield to play his animated self on “The Simpsons.” We hope Maggie crushes on him so hard. They’re about the same size.
9. Dispatch: The beloved group’s first new studio album in more than a decade comes out. Good news for fans of real live music created by human beings.
10. Chavril: Admit it, Avril Lavigne and Chad Kroeger’s engagement feels like a sign of the apocalypse, doesn’t it?