"Beastly" is most likely going to make a lot of money.
I am most likely not going to like it.
And it will not matter a bit.
To be fair, I haven't seen the last film by Daniel Barnz, 2008's "Phoebe In Wonderland," a moderately well-reviewed picture with Elle Fanning, Felicity Huffman, Patricia Clarkson, Bill Pullman, and Campbell Scott. Here, though, we've got a movie that is like a "Twilight"-fan-seeking-missile. It is a fascinatingly crafted, just in this 47-minute sneak peek they've posted today.
Wait. It's not actually 47 minutes. I had to go back and look, and I'm surprised it's only actually a total of 2 1/2 minutes. It's a "Beauty and the Beast" riff for the crowd that has been well-and-truly primed with the adventures of Edward and Buffy and Angel and Bella and now, here it is, the ol' girl-sees-past-a-rough-exterior-to-the-cuddlebuddy-buried-deep-inside number.
Vanessa Hudgens and a dude star in the film as the girl and... well, the dude. I'm not sure who the kid is at first glance. IMDb offers up "Alex Pettyfer." Still drawing a blank. I read his previous credits, and "'Entertainment Tonight' (Himself)" is the most familiar thing on the list before this. No matter. He was hired right, based on the glimpse here. As the pre-curse version of himself, he's almost absurdly pretty, and then when he's become "The Beast," he just looks like a dude who took Burning Man a little too far. It's carefully designed "ugly" make-up.
Let's see if I'm right. Let's see if CBS Films can deliver on the throwdown they made in the just-released trailer, which MTV Films exclusively premiered.