Recapping Television's Hottest Shows with Monkeys as Critics
The final three are chosen â€“ and one eliminated designer breaks down
It’s down to the final four, and this is both exciting (we’re that much closer to the really big show!) and dreary (Tim has to tromp around the country and eat bad meals with designers and their families). But we do get a peek at the finalists’ designs, which should be fun. Or, in Gwetchen’s case, probably a little gag inducing, but hey, I’m just allergic to patchouli. Anyway, let’s get to it!
[Full recap of Thursday's (Oct. 21) "Project Runway" after the break...]
The models compete to be Grammy Girls and portray fashion icons
Can we just give Ann the contract now and avoid the whole awkward presentation of the yay-we’re-going-to-another-country-bring-in-the-male-models-in-lederhosen? Please? No?
[Full recap of Wednesday's (Oct. 20) "Top Model" after the break...]
The claws come out as both Tribes face Tribal Council
Welcome to another week of "Survivor: Nicaragua," the season formerly known as "Survivor: Jimmy Johnson Edition," until Jimmy Johnson was voted out, and "Survivor: Old vs. Young," until the age-based twist was eliminated last week. As Wednesday's (Oct. 20) episode begins, it's more like "Survivor: Who The Heck's On Which Tribe?"
Let's see if clarity ensues... After the break...
Another dancer gets the boot, and Shakira shows off her moves
When Brooke Burns declares the dances of the TV theme episode “the most entertaining yet,” it makes me wonder if the producers of “DWTS” are just sadistic. I don’t think sticking someone in a monkey suit or jerking around a senior citizen until she gets whiplash are exactly entertaining moments, but maybe I didn’t watch enough “Jackass” when I had the chance.
[Full recap of Tuesday's (Oct. 19) "Dancing with the Stars" after the break...]
Lives are at stake as Thomas and The President play chicken
It’s come time for the early season payoff of “The Event,” in which Sean Walker and President Martinez show us exactly why they’re the heroes of this show. If this were “24,” this would be the episode where Jack kills the mid-level bad guys and seemingly solves the country’s crisis. Of course, this merely marks the point in the season where we head further down the rabbit hole; Jack would discover that the apparent threat was just a distraction from something much more sinister. Sean and Martinez will be in a much worse situation soon, to be sure, but for now we’re given a brief moment to cheer for their success.
[Full recap of Monday's (Oct. 19) "The Event" after the break...]
The celebs dance to TV themes, and one couple makes monkeys of themselves
Is it me, or was anyone else quietly sick to their stomach when they heard this week’s dances would be set to TV theme songs? Clearly, someone is feeling some pressure to keep “DWTS” fresh, but really, in the distance I see Fonzie on water skis, people. Sure, many of us have fond memories of goofy old TV theme songs. We may even know the words to some of the really annoying ones. But that doesn’t mean I want to see some D-list celebrity hoofing a foxtrot to “The Facts of Life.” Most theme songs are catchy, yes, but in the way a Wiggles song is catchy. While this may make a song lodge in a deep, dark part of your brain for life, whether you like it or not, it doesn’t make it good dance music. I’m worried that the next theme episode will be dancing to TV jingles of the ‘70s and ‘80s, and we’ll be watching the celebs waltzing to Alka-Seltzer and RC Cola ditties.
[Full recap of Monday's (Oct. 18) "Dancing with the Stars" after the break...]
The teams head to Sweden and visit the Icehotel
This season of "The Amazing Race" started last month with The Watermelon Incident, which took an otherwise so-so leg and made it awesome.
That was followed up by two dismal legs with poorly motivated challenges, bad editing and almost no drama, particularly with last week's Non-Elimination anti-climax.
But on Sunday (Oct. 17) night, "The Amazing Race" finally delivered the season's first truly excellent leg, an action-packed hour that included airport drama, difficult tasks, tough choices and a somewhat sad elimination, all set against the backdrop of a location I've always wanted to visit.
More thoughts on this week's reversal-of-fortune leg after the break...
The final four are chosen â€“ and one designer botches the last challenge
Final five! Whoo hoo! It’s probably too much to hope that Gwetchen will be given the boot, but at this stage in the competition, it’s hard to imagine who else will be aufed. Yes, Michael C. has been circling the drain for the last few challenges, but so has Gwetchen, and if I had to pick one of the two to go to Fashion Week, well, I’d go with Michael C. even if the rumors about him being a backstabbing cheater are true, only because we’ve seen ample evidence of Gwetchen’s evilness. And besides, the woman’s designs are so nauseatingly boho they’d make Stevie Nicks want to man it up a little.
[Full recap of Thursday's (Oct. 14) "Project Runway" after the break...]
A shapeshifter is discovered in a surprising place, which threatens Fauxlivia's infiltration efforts
I’m not the world’s biggest expert on “Blade Runner,” or even a medium expert. So while I am sure there will be tons of reviews of tonight’s episode of “Fringe” that do point-by-point comparisons of the movie inspired by the Philip K. Dick novel “Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?”, this won’t be one of those.
[Full recap of Thursday's (Oct. 14) "Fringe" after the break...]
The models learn to be brands and then take to Rodeo Drive for a shoot
Welcome back to the latest in the adventures of the Ann the Ent, in which she shambles through the forests of Lothlorien, befriending hobbits and ... wait, what? This is not a show about slow-talking sentient redwoods who can speak and so forth?
Whatever. I have no idea what I’m watching right now. I’ll just recap whatever I see.
[Recap of Wednesday's (Oct. 13) "America's Next Top Model" after the break...]