It’s elimination night (waah waah) and, as usual, we get the tired patter about how anyone can go home and one bad dance could put a nail in a celebrity’s dancing career coffin or some other weirdly mixed metaphor that makes sense if you don’t think about it too much. This week, Tom mentions that one couple was shocked by their crap dance, so he asks us if lightning strike again. Okay, I take that back about making sense if you don’t think about it too much. I really think they should just ask Tom to wing it through the intros, because even on a moment’s notice he’s still a hell of a lot pithier than the show’s writers.
OK, now this? THIS? This should have been the 90-minute episode of “Glee.” Last week’s entry “Born This Way” was overlong, undercooked, and designed primarily to hurt the premiere of “The Voice” rather than show scenes that simply couldn’t land on the cutting room floor. Now, in saying that “Rumours” should have been the extended episode doesn’t mean the hour was flawless by any means. But it had enough good ideas that it could have used the extra breathing room in order to flesh them out.
And then there was another episode.
It’s hard to believe that there is so very little time left in the first (and likely last) season of “The Event.” This week’s installment, “Us of Them,” seems to consciously avoid any effort to build momentum or ramp up the action. Instead of watching our heroes perform the badass deeds we expect of an end game, we watch them develop an under-cooked love story. We watch them find the bad guy...but then not really. They quarantine an airplane...but then not really. What we really watch them do is kill time, and little else. I’m forced to assume that poor reception and terrible ratings have forced the writers to abort most of what they had planned for the inaugural season, because this simply cannot be all that they had planned, right?
I feel bad continuing to take potshots at a series that has clearly had everything possible go wrong for it, but at the same time no show, with this few episodes remaining, should be this much of a chore to sit through.
[Full recap of Monday’s (May 2) “The Event” after the break...]
There’s a link between the way that prophecies tend to work on scripted shows and the act of actually scripting said shows. Both have long-term goals that tend to get muddied up when put into actual practice. In the case of “Fringe,” it’s tempting to see everything laid out tonight as the summation of all that’s come before it. It’s also tempting to see it as one hell of a clever retcon, taking bits and pieces of all that’s come before it and shape it into the slick Frankenstein monster you watched tonight.
Personally, I could care less which way it actually occurred. You hear enough about showrunners and their long-term plans, and most of it’s just baloney. The proof’s in the pudding, or in this case, the interdimensionally charged electro-pudding. And “The Last Sam Weiss” was pretty delicious pudding.
[Full recap of Friday's (April 29) "Fringe" after the break...]
This is going to be an episode of big, big changes. And I’m pretty sure not all of these changes are going to be happy ones. But that’s okay, because when there’s not enough drama on the show we tend to see a lot of Stefan and Elena making out, which is about as sexy as watching the neighborhood cats going at it. What can I say? I’m a Damon fan. Anyway, let’s get to it, after the break...
Welcome, friends, to the most NFL Draft-astic "American Idol" results show yet. Am I more interested in Thursday's (April 28) Draft than the "Idol" elimination? Yes. But fortunately, the only event in the entire world with more filler than an "American Idol" results show is the NFL Draft.
Click through for the full "Idol" recap...
Between garbage-themed shoots and Alexandria’s trash talk, thinks are getting rotten here on Cycle 16 of "America’s Next Top Model". Here’s a theme for you: Recycling! Forget Molly and Brittani and “fiercely real” token fatty Kasia! Bring back Ann Ward from the last season! Now there was a classy broad. No complaints about pigeons! No meltdowns during panel! No horrific weaves! Come back, 2010, come back!
This week, the chefs are facing a low-cal dining challenge, which doesn’t seem that challenging to me. I mean, if Applebee’s can pump out low-cal meals that may or may not taste like crap and/or be miniature food (anyone who can weigh in, feel free), I would hope that very skilled master chefs would be able to do the same. The contestants from “The Biggest Loser” will be on hand to sample the meals, which should be a treat for them as no one will be screaming at them to do push ups until they vomit. Hopefully.