<p>Joseph Morgan's Klaus on Thursday's 'The Vampire Diaries'</p>

Joseph Morgan's Klaus on Thursday's 'The Vampire Diaries'

Credit: The CW

Recap: 'The Vampire Diaries' - 'Klaus'

Elijah’s back with juicy secrets to reveal

Elijah is BACK! Or, at least it seems fair to assume he is, as Elena plucked the dagger out of his chest last week. I’m also assuming that Elena hasn’t come to her senses and decided that said plucking was a CRAZY thing to do and promptly plunged that dagger right back in. I know, I know, she’s trying to save Bonnie’s life, as the dagger can be used to kill that other pesky original Klaus so that dear Bonnie doesn’t go toes up using her witchy powers to do the same thing. But that sort of overlooks the little complication that Elijah will not have a dagger in his chest during that time, and he’s SO much more agreeable when he’s sort of dead. Elena has her heart in the right place, but I fear that by the time this episode is over the rest of her organs may be in the wrong place and mostly dead.

[Full recap of Thursday's (April 21) "The Vampire Diaries" after the break...]
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<p>Jacob Lusk of 'American Idol'</p>

Jacob Lusk of 'American Idol'

Credit: FOX

Recap: 'American Idol' Results - Down to 6

David Cook and Katy Perry perform and another contestant heads home

Welcome to another Anything Can Happen Thursday (April 21) on "American Idol." Last night's recap predicted that Haley would go home, but several commenters disagreed. So who knows what might happen?

I certainly don't.

Click through for the full recap...

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<p>Steve of 'Survivor: Redemption Island'</p>

Steve of 'Survivor: Redemption Island'

Credit: CBS

Recap: 'Survivor: Redemption Island' - 'Rice Wars'

Accusations of racism and ricism boil over at camp and Tribal Council
Pre-credit sequence. Matt is a broken man. As we begin the episode on Redemption Island, Matt's praying to various facets of the Trinity making it clear that he'd just as soon go home, but that he's willing to stick around and fight if it's God's will. Matt isn't sleeping and while he says he's trying to hold onto his sanity, there's ample evidence that that particular ship has already sailed. He's ready to go head-to-head with Marine Mike, when David walks into their little camp. Suddenly, Matt is going through a list of people who wouldn't quit. That list includes his dad, his brother and, of course, Jesus. "My mind's completely blown at this point," Matt admits. Nobody has a clue what to expect from future Duels or from possible positions on the jury. Why won't God or Jeff Probst explain things to them?!?
 
Full recap of Wednesday's (April 20) "Survivor: Redemption Island" after the break...
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<p>Celina Tio and John Currence of 'Top Chef Masters'</p>

Celina Tio and John Currence of 'Top Chef Masters'

Credit: Bravo

Recap: 'Top Chef Masters' - 'Diners to Donors'

The elimination challenge is full of surprises – including the winner

Eeeeee! Tonight is the bug challenge! This is both exciting and revolting at the same time, not unlike a Charlie Sheen podcast. Although part of me loves that “Top Chef Masters” comes up with some wacky challenges for our chefs, I do wonder if making them cook bugs is a bit too far, as I’m not sure it really shows whether or not they’re good chefs. I mean, I wouldn’t hold someone’s fried scorpion against them, literally or figuratively. Of course, that’s assuming I would eat the thing anyway.

[Full recap of Wednesday's "Top Chef Masters" recap after the break...]

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<p>Casey Abrams of 'American Idol'</p>

Casey Abrams of 'American Idol'

Credit: FOX

Recap: 'American Idol' Top 7 - Songs of the 21st Century

Several singers don't push hard enough, but one kisses Jennifer Lopez

Tuesday (April 20) night's "American Idol" theme is Songs of the 21st Century, which ought to give our Top 7 the chance to be a little bit more contemporary than our recent string of old-skewing themes.

Who benefited from going modern? Click through for my recap...

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<p>'Dancing with the Stars'</p>

'Dancing with the Stars'

Credit: ABC

Recap: 'Dancing with the Stars' Results - A fourth star departs

The wrong couple gets the boot

Bah, humbug. It’s elimination night, and unless you’re wildly excited to see Toby Keith perform, there’s just not a lot to be excited about. With couples flip-flopping between the top of the leader board and the bottom week to week, it’s hard to guess who would be going home tonight. However, it’s easy to assume that whoever it is, we’ll be sad to see them go. Okay, I won’t cry if Kendra gets the boot, but even she’s good for some BLEEPING laughs from time to time.  

[Full recap of Tuesday's (April 19) "Dancing with the Stars" results after the break...]
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<p>Gwyneth Paltrow in the 'Night of Neglect' episode of 'Glee'</p>

Gwyneth Paltrow in the 'Night of Neglect' episode of 'Glee'

Credit: FOX

Recap: 'Glee' - 'Night of Neglect'

Sue seeks to undermine plans to raise money for a trip to Nationals

Well, after what seems like 45 years, “Glee” returned tonight to start the march towards the end of its second season. Many shows would take the time to hone scripts, rethink final arcs, and generally sharpen things up on the way to an all-too-close finale. But “Glee” isn’t most shows, so “A Night of Neglect” was a typical grab bag of plots, tones, and enough characters to fill the wide shots in an epic motion picture. Odd, since so much of the episode took place in a sparsely filled theatre.

[Full recap of Tuesday's (April 19) "Glee" after the break...]

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<p>Sarah Roemer of 'The Event'&nbsp;</p>

Sarah Roemer of 'The Event' 

Credit: NBC

Recap: 'The Event' - 'Cut Off the Head'

Senator Lewis tests blood, while Leila questions her blood ties

If  nothing else, “The Event” gave me my favorite moment of the series, tonight. For the most part, “Cut Off the Head” is a dull transition episode, moving from the reveal of Sophia being a genocidal maniac, to the climactic end-game battle between humans and aliens that appears to be coming. It’s not nearly as bad as much of the show has been, but it’s relatively inert (the cliffhanger is a closeup of a coffee mug!)

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<p>Chris Jericho and Cheryl Burke of 'Dancing with the Stars'</p>

Chris Jericho and Cheryl Burke of 'Dancing with the Stars'

Credit: ABC

Recap: 'Dancing with the Stars' Performances - American Week

The competition gets tougher as judges start handing out high scores
It’s American week! Because… why? Isn’t every week American week, as the show takes place here? Unfortunately, this random theme means our celebrities will be forced to dance to songs that were never, ever meant to be danced to. Like “Yankee Doodle Dandy.” Yes, you can stomp out a good parade march to it, but ballroom dance to it? Egads. And look! Our celebs are dressed like they’ve been sucked through a vent at an American flag factory! I’m all for patriotism and the good old American way, don’t get me wrong, but I just don’t see this working out very well.
 
[Full recap of Monday's (April 18) "Dancing with the Stars" after the break...]
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<p>Zev and Justin of 'The Amazing Race'</p>

Zev and Justin of 'The Amazing Race'

Credit: CBS

Recap: 'The Amazing Race' - 'I Cannot Deal With Your Psycho Behavior'

The racers look to avoid Freudian slips as they race through Austria.

On a night when many are following an epic struggle over the Iron Throne of Westeros, “The Amazing Race” honestly feels sort of quaint. While the “Unfinished Business” conceit has perhaps added additional emotional interest to the race, in that we have preexisting connections to these teams, the actual legs have been fairly nondescript. The only major change this season has been the proliferation of “You’re Still Racing” moments, which are not exactly new and have created artificial cliffhangers instead of actual tension. That doesn’t mean the season has been bad, per se, but it hasn’t been anything to write home about.

However, with Dan indisposed this evening, I have my first chance to write about the season since the premiere, and “I Cannot Deal With Your Psycho Behavior” offers a few twists and turns which I thought were pretty effective. It’s not a perfect leg by any means, bunching in the same space we would expect it to bunch in, but a tricky detour tests each team’s sense of strategy and delineates between those who are letting the game control them and those who are looking to take control of their own destiny.

And, unsurprisingly, it’s the latter teams who come out ahead, as the former teams find they’ve bitten off more than they could chew.

Until they discover, of course, that one can always throw up and try again.

[Recap, and hopefully fewer terrible metaphors, after the break.]

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