<p>Kasia of 'America's Next Top Model,' post-makeover.</p>

Kasia of 'America's Next Top Model,' post-makeover.

Credit: The CW

Recap: 'America's Next Top Model' - 'Lori Goldstein'

It's time for... Makeovers! And nothing else really matters after that.

So long, Nicole. We’ll see your high-fashion spreads in Women’s Day and Redbook soon enough, gurl. For the remaining contestants, it’s makeover time. But because this is Tyra, we can’t just say that. We can’t just say hey girls quit shrieking and get in the TyraMobile and sit still for six hours while we build up your coif with hair from some poor anonymous girl in India. No, we need to come home to a big old curtain tassel that must be pulled! While shrieking! A scrim drops down listing all the makeovers in store for the girls. One transformation threatens to be “manly, short brown spikes,” and Sara hopes it isn’t her. Poor girl already has a rat tail.

 
[Full recap of Wednesday's (March 9) "America's Next Top Model" after the break...]
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<p>Naima Adedapo of 'American Idol'</p>

Naima Adedapo of 'American Idol'

Credit: FOX

Recap: 'American Idol' - Top 13 Performances

James brought a softer side, but Naima brought a storm

Last week there were 24 singers on "American Idol" and you sent 11 of them packing, America. In fact, you tried to send 14 of them packing, but the judges kept Ashthon Jones, Stefano Langone and Naima Adedapo around.

You can read my interviews with the entire Top 13 here.

On Wednesday (March 9) night, the "Idol" Finalists sang songs from *their* Idols.

How did that turn out? Click through...

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<p>Matthew Morrison and Gwyneth Paltrow of 'Glee'</p>

Matthew Morrison and Gwyneth Paltrow of 'Glee'

Credit: Adam Rose/FOX

Recap: 'Glee' - 'Sexy'

Students and teachers alike struggle with their sexual identities

In honor of tonight’s “Glee,” I contemplated making this review eight completely unrelated paragraphs. That, I felt, would be a literal and honest response to yet another schizophrenic hour of television. But somehow I feel like the powers that be here at HitFix might frown upon such a technique, so I’m left trying to cobble together coherent thoughts about “Sexy,” an episode that was honestly anything but.

[Full recap of Tuesday's (March 8) "Glee" after the break...]

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<p>Clea Duvall of 'The Event'</p>

Clea Duvall of 'The Event'

Credit: NBC

Recap: 'The Event' - 'And Then There Were More' and 'Inostranka'

NBC's confusing fall thriller returns with more questions, few answers

“The Event” returns from a lengthy hiatus tonight with not one, but two hours chock full of...well, stuff that happens. The series has been gone for so long that, in my excitement over recapping it again, I forgot for a moment that I don’t actually much care for this show. But with the appropriately titled “And Then There Were More,” and “Inostranka” fresh off my television set, I already feel exhausted by the thought of coming up with something, [i]anything[/i], to say about this series that’s supposed to be providing water-cooler intrigue.

[Full recap after the break...]

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<p>Zev and Justin of 'The Amazing Race'</p>

Zev and Justin of 'The Amazing Race'

Credit: CBS

Recap: 'The Amazing Race' - 'We Had a Lot of Evil Spirits Apparently'

The teams head to Japan to play in the mud
"The Amazing Race" is a competition/challenge series that happens to go through a number of foreign countries, sometimes taking advantage of the cultural specifics and topography of said countries, but sometimes just using those countries a convenient way-stations for a game or two.
 
That is to say that "The Amazing Race" is not a travel show. It's a show on which people travel. 
 
Maybe because "The Amazing Race" is no stranger to Japan and maybe because a full quarter of an episode had to be dedicated to a choice between two flights ostensibly arriving 15 minutes apart, Sunday's (March 6) episode made a very compelling case that The Land of the Rising Sun is a place where people talk funny, dress funny and perform really wacky rituals. Rarely have I noticed the show falling so completely and utterly on its face when trying to showcase another nation and its rituals.
 
But there were a number of reasons why Sunday's episode was pretty poor. Casual mockery of the Japanese was only part of it.
 
Click through for the full recap...
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<p>Miley Cyrus</p>

Miley Cyrus

Credit: Dan Steinberg/AP

Recap: 'Saturday Night Live' - Miley Cyrus and The Strokes

Did 'SNL' return with an episode that was pretty cool?

I know, I know: you’re worried about Miley Cyrus hosting “Saturday Night Live.” But look at it this way: a lot of people were worried about Taylor Swift hosting, and that ended up being one of the strongest episodes in recent years. Plus, given this season’s tendency to make the host fit around the cast (as opposed to the other way around), it’s possible that her youth, singing voice, and hopefully game attitude will produce some interesting sketches.

Then again, it’s possible that the entire show will consist of “The Miley Cyrus Show,” a lot of Charlie Sheen sketches, plus The Strokes intermittently saving the day. Could go either way. I’m staying positive until showtime.

As always, I’ll be grading each sketch in real time. Onto the show!

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<p>Lauren Alaina of 'American Idol'</p>

Lauren Alaina of 'American Idol'

Credit: FOX

Recap: 'American Idol' Results - Down to the Top 13

Who did America send home in the biggest voter cut in 'Idol' history?

"American Idol" begins Thursday (March 3) night's telecast with 24 singers competing for a number of spots expected to be somewhere between 10 and 13. Whether we end up trimming 11 singers or an even higher, it will be the most carnage the American People have ever been responsible for in a single episode. And sorting out the surviving contestants will take a full two hours of over-extended triage.

Click through to find out what you've done, America...

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<p>Stephanie of 'Survivor: Redemption Island'</p>

Stephanie of 'Survivor: Redemption Island'

Credit: CBS

Recap: 'Survivor: Redemption Island' - 'Keep Hope Alive'

Somebody finally goes home, while Russell begins to scramble
Pre-credit sequence. We begin on Redemption Island on Night 5. Matt arrives at camp and wakes up a disoriented and confused Francesca. "Why are you here instead of Phillip?" Francesca asks, somewhat incredulous at the blindside. Matt hadn't even packed his stuff. The two bootees agree that Boston Rob is a scoundrel. Now Matt is feeling like "a goober." But he's philosophical. He wants to be the underdog and to return for the chance at the million.
 
Full recap of Thursday's "Survivor: Redemption Island" after the break...
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<p>Mikey learns about his roots on 'Top Chef All-Stars'</p>

Mikey learns about his roots on 'Top Chef All-Stars'

Credit: Bravo

Recap: 'Top Chef All-Stars' - 'Give Me Your Huddled Masses'

This elimination challenge is so tough even the judges are stumped

Five chefs remain – and one of them is Tiffany. Huh. Richard can’t believe Dale went home last week, neither can Tiffany and for that matter, color me stumped, too. What no one says (except for Tiffany) is that everyone was pretty sure she was packing her knives last week, as she’s seemed to be circling the drain for a while now. I’m not saying she isn’t talented, but some of her dishes have seemed, if not inedible, a little rough. At this stage in the competition, the bar has been raised awfully high and I’m just not sure she’s firing on all burners, so to speak.

[Full recap of Wednesday's "Top Chef" after the break...]
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<p>Brittani of 'America's Next Top Model'</p>

Brittani of 'America's Next Top Model'

Credit: The CW

Recap: 'America's Next Top Model' - 'Alek Wek'

The models take acting lessons and then pose with live bees

Sexsational: It’s the “werq” of 2011, ladies! And it’s also the word that the judges have used to describe Molly, the first panel winner. Poor Nicole, meanwhile needs to get her youth on; she’s been told by the panel that she photographs 15 years too old. Ouch! But will Tyra pay for her laser peel?

[Full recap of Wednesday's (March 2) "America's Next Top Model" after the break...]

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