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Count von Count from 'Sesame Street' and Count Blah from 'Greg the Bunny'
"Sesame Street," Count von Count
Show run: 1972-present
What gives him fangs: Dude can keep a body count -- or at least count a count-count. This beloved character has an unmistakeable voice, signature teeth, a cape and even a monocle to keep track of all his stuff.
Why he sucks: The Count may be mean at numbers, but he's not a mean vampire.
Scariness quotient: 1. Cracks himself up every time.
"Greg the Bunny," Count Blah
Show run: 2002 (in its FOX incarnation)
What gives him fangs: Count Blah has struggled to find his way in the industry after being usurped by Count von Count, an Italian impostor who grabbed the spotlight and made it almost impossible for fabricated vampires to find work on children's shows. In theory, this gives him a chip on his shoulder. But mostly it doesn't.
Why he sucks: Count Blah is eager to be relevant to a younger generation, but the attempt to rebrand himself as Count A'ight [Blah] ends in disaster.
Scariness quotient (1-10): 2. It's unclear if Count Blah is a threat to anybody, but he's definitely scarier than that that "****ing OCD numerologist" on "Sesame Street."