As strong an example of what happens when you end up on the wrong side of the fine line between crass commercialism and naked contempt for an audience as you'll find this year.  Rob Marshall managed to suck whatever fun remained in the idea of watching Johnny Depp wobble about doing his Captain Jack shtick, and Penelope Cruz is visually appealing but utterly wasted in her role as his not-even-slightly-believable love interest.  Since this worst film in the series made a billion dollars worldwide, we can expect them to keep getting worse in the future.  That's not a promise… it's a threat.

- Drew McWeeny