Who wants to revisit that closeup of John Turturro's droopy thong-ass in "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen"? You do!

That's right, the Honest Trailer for Michael Bay's abominable junkyard-porn sequel is finally here, and in it you can expect lots of juicy takedowns on everything from the film's confusing plot, Shia LaBeouf's "der" face, racist caricatures in the guise of anthropomorphic robots and absolutely everything involving Michael Bay. My only beef is with the narrator's Megan Fox dig, which feels a little unfair given that she's shown flashes of real talent in other projects (I said "flashes"). But it's a small quibble; overall it's another bang-up job by the folks over at Screen Junkies.

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A former contributor to sites including MTV's The Backlot and Bloody-Disgusting, Chris Eggertsen worked in film development before indulging his love of pop culture writing full time. He specializes in horror, the intersection of social issues and entertainment and Howard Stern. He's on Twitter @HitFixChris.