Attention nerds: always wanted one of the Avengers inside you but resigned yourself to the utter futility of that impossible dream? Well today is your lucky day, because some guy on Tumblr named Balazs Sarmai has designed an entire line of sex toys based on all six of the Avengers plus Loki, including but not limited to the Captain America vibrator, the Thor electrical stimulator and - my personal favorite - the Hulk 12" silicone dildo (talk about a gang-bang!) While they're admittedly just concepts for now, if Marvel knows what's good for them they'll get in on the ground floor here and start stocking these suckers in Wal-Marts all across the country.

(Even more Avengers sex toys)


Captain America vibrator


Hulk dildo


Thor electrical stimulator


Loki luxury vibrator

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A former contributor to sites including MTV's The Backlot and Bloody-Disgusting, Chris Eggertsen worked in film development before indulging his love of pop culture writing full time. He specializes in horror, the intersection of social issues and entertainment and Howard Stern. He's on Twitter @HitFixChris.