Here are three things I know about The "Apparently" Kid:

1) He is awesome.

2) He is infallible.

3) He is a miniaturized Wallace Shawn.

In case you're unaware of the genius at hand, here's his viral video debut from just a month ago.

Now you get it. Apparently your life just improved.

The kid is 5-year-old Noah Ritter, and he's finally making the jump from local news legend to international stardom. Here he visits Ellen DeGeneres and wows her with coruscating starpower the minute he sits down. Get ready to clutch your heart in adoration and awe.