Apologies to all the young girls out there who were watching the Miss USA pageant expecting to find a new intellectual hero: Miss Utah really blew it for you. First of all, who better than NeNe Leakes to ask a probing question about pay inequality? And second of all, what better an outfit to pontificate about the subject in than a see-through wedding gown?

Disappointment all around.

Liana Maeby grew up in Los Angeles and it has made her just as terrible as you'd expect. A graduate of USC's film school, she previously worked as an editor for Crushable.com, and has written for publications like Interview and The Village Voice. Her first book, a satirical work entitled "Earl Can Hurl (You Can Hurl Too)" written when she was eight, remains unpublished.