Jake Fogelnest just does cool stuff. Like professionally, Jake is a doer of cool stuff. He's got a podcast called The Fogelnest Files where he explores forgotten gems from the history of pop culture with guests like Fred Armisen and Andrew W.K., he plays tunes on Sirius XMU radio every day, and he runs one of Twitter's greatest parody accounts: the character Danny Tripp late of "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip." Plus, he wears sunglasses at night, probably. I asked Jake five super stupid questions and he answered them -- and I didn't even have to hold him at gunpoint or threaten to cry or nothin'.

Jake! Hi. Question one: what is the most underrated band of all time?
SLOAN. They are giant rockstars in Canada but here in these United States, they are criminally underrated. They are great. Also, BAND-AID as a product is underrated. They can literally stop people from bleeding. That is really intense if you think about it!!

I hate hiking. Tell me why I’m right/wrong.
I used to be like you before I moved to Los Angeles and became all Hollywood. Runyon Canyon is a lovely way to spend some time! I say if you don't like hiking, well then you can just TAKE A HIKE!

(Note: I am only interested in hiking when it's in Los Angeles and in a controlled show business setting.)

What should Aaron Sorkin’s next project be?
A Twitter account. I bet that would end well.

Who’s #5 on your list of celebrity crushes?
That big, red, hairy monster from Looney Tunes. What a nut! Also, very sexy.  

What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
I'd like to send out blog questionnaires! [Ed. Note: That job is TAKEN, Jake. The dental benefits are incredible.]