Look, if I could be guaranteed to have a kid as amazing as this one, I would go out and get pregnant immediately. But you never know, do you? You could end up stuck with a boring little tyke with no viral YouTube capabilities at all.

So for now, I'll just stick to dog ownership. And continue to pay for their canine dance lessons.

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Liana Maeby grew up in Los Angeles and it has made her just as terrible as you'd expect. A graduate of USC's film school, she previously worked as an editor for Crushable.com, and has written for publications like Interview and The Village Voice. Her first book, a satirical work entitled "Earl Can Hurl (You Can Hurl Too)" written when she was eight, remains unpublished.