Hey look, it's your boyfriend Benedict Cumberbatch reciting lyrics by your other boyfriend, R. Kelly. How come you have so many boyfriends? Is it because you're a sex genius too?

I bet Benedict is totally wearing black panties under that suit.

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Liana Maeby grew up in Los Angeles and it has made her just as terrible as you'd expect. A graduate of USC's film school, she previously worked as an editor for Crushable.com, and has written for publications like Interview and The Village Voice. Her first book, a satirical work entitled "Earl Can Hurl (You Can Hurl Too)" written when she was eight, remains unpublished.