"American Horror Story" is an anomaly. Every season it recycles cast members but drops them into new, creeptastic scenarios as new characters. It is successfully blending the horror genre with fan fiction AU (Alternate Universes) and that is a great and terrible power, indeed.

So great in fact, FX commissioned a series of teasers designed to whip their fans into a frenzy ahead of the premiere of "American Horror Story: Freak Show" on October 8. Drunk with power, a dizzying sixteen trailers have been released. And that's not including the full-length trailer. As of this writing, FX still has four videos set to private, lying in wait to be unleashed upon an unwitting and weary public.

Beaten down by the ever-present thrum of new promos, resolve begins to weaken. Cracks begin to form in the mind and strange ideas slither in to take hold. Before you know it, it's too late.

Dear reader, I cannot be saved. But perhaps someone can learn something from my cautionary tale. ALL HAIL JESSICA LANGE.

Save yourselves!

Mom. Wife. Geek. Gamer. Feminist. Writer. Sarcastic. Succinct. Donna has been writing snark for the Internet in one form or another for almost a decade. She has a lot of opinions, mostly on science-fiction, fantasy, feminism, and Sailor Moon. Follow her on Twitter (@MildlyAmused) for more of all these things.