I feel like I'm supposed to apologize for the fact that I don't watch "Breaking Bad," but you know what? I ain't gonna! I am a rebel, I am an iconoclast, and I'm also probably missing out on some really great television. But hey - I've totally got the gist of what this show is about down pat... right?

Also? I used the word "desolate" incorrectly here, and I will be embarrassed about that forever and ever.


Liana Maeby grew up in Los Angeles and it has made her just as terrible as you'd expect. A graduate of USC's film school, she previously worked as an editor for Crushable.com, and has written for publications like Interview and The Village Voice. Her first book, a satirical work entitled "Earl Can Hurl (You Can Hurl Too)" written when she was eight, remains unpublished.