Here at RIOT you can always count on us to cover the important stuff, like Miley Cyrus sex pumpkins, nude photos of Alexander Skarsgard and also Twitter #hashtag trends. Speaking of the latter, today brought with it another totally meaningful Twit-craze known as #FilmPrequels, in which individuals create clever titles for film prologues that will never, ever happen, even though some of them actually probably should (and would, by god, if it were up to me). Take for instance the 14 brilliant ideas below, my favorite of which features a faux-poster mashing up a terrible-but-beloved '80s classic starring Michael J. Fox and that one Martin Scorsese movie where Leonardo DiCaprio gets a candle shoved up his butt.

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A former contributor to sites including MTV's The Backlot and Bloody-Disgusting, Chris Eggertsen worked in film development before indulging his love of pop culture writing full time. He specializes in horror, the intersection of social issues and entertainment and Howard Stern. He's on Twitter @HitFixChris.