1. Most of the zippers on this outfit just lead to more zippers.
2. Moschino sounds like a variety of cherry that only Ariana Grande knows about.
3. It's hard to find Ariana sexy when she looks so much like Olivia on "The Cosby Show."
4. Ariana usually looks 13. When done up in tight clothing and bright red lipstick, she somehow looks five.
5. She is a Bratz doll of Jennifer Lopez.
6. She is a "Carrie Diaries" version of Mariah Carey.
7. She's basically Regina's 8-year-old sister in "Mean Girls" who gyrates to "Milkshake."
8. Who at the VMAs would appreciate her dominatrix act? Ed Sheeran?
9. In those boots, she's almost 4'9.
10. I wouldn't be surprised if you told me this outfit was made of 40 wallets.