Best. Episode. Ever? Pick your 'Simpsons' favorite
As the show prepares to air its 500th episode, what's the one you love best?
"The Simpsons" as they looked nearly 500 episodes ago.
"The Simpsons" airs its 500th episode this Sunday night. "At Long Last Leave," like many latter-day "Simpsons" outings, features a story we've seen variations on several times before (including in "The Simpsons Movie"), but also features many funny jokes that affirm my belief that I'm happier to live in a world that keeps giving us new "Simpsons" episodes (especially when they are occasionally as great as "Holidays of Future Passed") than I will be in the one where that inevitably stops. The couch gag in particular is marvelous, and actually made me choke up a bit.
The show has been on so long, has passed so many anniversaries, that I've run out of deep thoughts to say about the series at this latest milestone. So instead, I will borrow a suggestion from Time's Jame Poniewozik, who took the occasion of the 500th episode to both declare his own favorite "Simpsons" episode ever ("Homer's Enemy," which I've never liked) and to invite viewers to do the same.
I like Poniewozik's insistence on being absolute here. You can't name your 2 or 3 favorites, can't rattle off a list. Off the top of your head, if someone asks you what your favorite "Simpsons" episode ever is, what comes to mind? For me, it's "Homer the Heretic," the third episode of the show's magical fourth season, in which Homer decides to skip church for once, has the best Sunday of his life, and decides that, from now on, he's going to worship the Lord in his own way, as he wisely explains to Marge here:
There are many, many, many "Simpsons" episodes I can easily and immediately accept as someone's favorite, but to me, "Homer the Heretic" captures everything that was and is great about the series: social satire, extraordinary quotability ("'This Things I Believe'"), a good family story, and an innate sweetness in spite of Homer's outsized antics.
That's mine. Your turn. Remember: pick only one, and, if you have time, explain why it's your favorite.
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All through his childhood, Alan Sepinwall's relatives told his parents, "All that boy does is watch television! How's he going to make a living doing that?" His career as a TV critic has been 15 years and counting of his attempt to answer their concerns. "What's Alan Watching" is a blog whose title is self-explanatory: Alan watches TV shows, then writes about what he watched. He can be reached at sepinwall@hitfix.com
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February 17, 2012 at 11:17AM EST Reply to CommentLisa the Vegetarian
Tom Co-sign! So many classic lines.
February 17, 2012 at 11:18AM ESTTom Case in point:
February 17, 2012 at 11:20AM ESTHomer: Are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Ham?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Pork chops?
Lisa: Dad, those all come from the same animal.
Homer: Heh heh heh. Ooh, yeah, right, Lisa. A wonderful, magical animal.
Robb The "You don't win friends with salad" conga line was awesome and the flying pig being inspiration to the gay republicans was awesome.
February 17, 2012 at 11:31AM ESTDr. Bitz Skinner: That's two independent thought alarms in one day. Willie, the children are over- stimulated. Remove all the colored chalk from the classrooms.
February 17, 2012 at 12:02PM ESTWillie: I warned ya! Didn't I warn ya?! That colored chalk was forged by Lucifer himself!
Mark Kawakami Same here. It's a wonderful, magical eepisode.*
February 17, 2012 at 1:55PM EST*The extra "e" is for "eexcellent"**
**That's a typo.
JohnChoiniere I hate to be that guy, Robb, but you're confusing the flying pig with Maggie's escaped pink elephant balloon.
February 17, 2012 at 2:02PM ESTBrian Co-sign. True story. My wife asked me yesterday if I wanted salad. My reponse "you don't make friends with salad."
February 17, 2012 at 5:48PM ESTAvandelay Now jimmy let's go visit the killing floor
February 19, 2012 at 6:45PM ESTDon't let the name fool you it's more of a loose grate that lets materials fall through.
Nancy Agreed. Whenever I hear "St. Pepper" I always think of Apu's rendition from his secret roof garden.
February 21, 2012 at 11:30PM ESTJim
February 17, 2012 at 11:17AM EST Reply to CommentMarge vs. the Monorail. The end. Discussion over. You all lose if you say otherwise.
Jim I will also accept the episode with Hank Scorpio.
February 17, 2012 at 11:20AM ESTDave Agree.
February 17, 2012 at 11:22AM ESTHanley_John Marge vs. the Monorail is fantastic. Surveys of Ogdenville, Brockway, and North Haverbrook agree.
February 17, 2012 at 11:24AM ESTMax power "I call the big one Bitey"
February 17, 2012 at 11:40AM ESTAaron "I shouldn't have stopped for that haircut." Best line ever.
February 17, 2012 at 11:43AM ESTChinny So glad you allowed "You Only Move Twice." I never get tired of, "I moved here from Canada, and they think I'm slow."
February 17, 2012 at 12:41PM ESTAce Agreed!
February 17, 2012 at 1:33PM ESTMono...'doh!
Wade Kwon Marge: "Homer! There's someone here who can help you..."
February 17, 2012 at 2:17PM ESTHomer: "Is it Batman?"
Marge: "No, he's a scientist."
Homer: "Batman's a scientist?!"
Marge: "It's not Batman!”
Dezbot I met Matt Groening at Comic-Con last year and he said his favorite line from a Simpsons ep was "I call the big one Bitey."
February 17, 2012 at 3:16PM ESTKBB My favorite Simpsons joke ever is Homer's "Does whiskey count as beer?" response to the conductor commercial.
February 17, 2012 at 4:04PM ESTNick And two comely lasses of virtue true.
February 17, 2012 at 6:39PM ESTGil That episode was written by Conan Obrian
February 20, 2012 at 8:13PM ESTRobb Agreed. Marge Vs. The Monorail is the best, and You Only Move Twice is a close #2.
February 21, 2012 at 7:32PM EST"Weren't you one of the Little Rascals?"
JCS
February 17, 2012 at 11:18AM EST Reply to CommentKing Size Homer: A wonderful blend of comedy and strange pathos. I can quote all of it in its entirety, for all I've watched it!
robin
February 17, 2012 at 11:18AM EST Reply to Commentlisa the sceptic.
ADKid25
February 17, 2012 at 11:18AM EST Reply to CommentMarge vs. The Monorail. Perfect blend of character, story, and jokes.
JJ
February 17, 2012 at 11:19AM EST Reply to Comment$pringfield (Or, How I learned to stop worrying and love legalized gambling). Great Ralph moments (i.e. "I'm Idaho.") Great Homer (talking about the boogeyman, Gamblor, "well youuuuuuuu have a gambling problem"), great random pitch for "Brittania," the British hotel, the Robert Goulet cameo....it's just a pitch-perfect episode from minute one.
Gamblor Seconded.
February 17, 2012 at 5:13PM ESTGoulet: 'Are you from the casino?'
Bart: 'I'm from A casino.'
Also:
Goulet: Are you sure this is the casino? I think I should call my manager.
Nelson: Your manager says for you to shut up!
Goulet: _Vera_ said that? Hmph.
SCT
February 17, 2012 at 11:20AM EST Reply to CommentHomer at the Bat. "It's like there's a party in my mouth, and everyone's invited." Great cameos, good The Natural parody, and the song at the end.
Perfect episode.
sepinwall Love it, but also feel like I'm biased, because 6 of the 9 ringers for Burns' team wound up playing for the Yankees at some point in their career (Griffey, Ozzie and Scioscia were the outliers).
February 17, 2012 at 11:24AM ESTStanton Seconded.
February 17, 2012 at 11:36AM EST"You're Darryl Strawberry."
"Yes?"
"You play right field."
"Yes?"
"I play right field, too."
"Yes?"
"Are you better than me?"
"Well, I never met you, but, yes."
AJ This would get my vote. But I'm a baseball guy.
February 17, 2012 at 11:46AM ESTStreets Ahead LOVE THIS ONE! It's right behind "You Only Move Twice" for me.
February 17, 2012 at 12:54PM EST"No hustle, either, skip."
Dan Co-sign, especially about the song over the credits.
February 17, 2012 at 1:14PM EST
February 17, 2012 at 1:46PM ESTWade Kwon PITT THE ELDER!
February 17, 2012 at 2:19PM ESTBrian Amazing. I love when Mr. Burns wants to get a bunch of ringers and asks Smithers to get him Honus Wagner, Nap Lajoie and Mordecai Brown among others.
February 17, 2012 at 5:52PM ESTSean Burns: You, Strawberry, hit the showers.
February 17, 2012 at 9:45PM ESTStraw: But I've got nine home runs!
Burns: You see Strawberry, you're a left handed hitter, and he's a left handed pitcher...it's called playing the percentages. It's what good managers do to win ball games.
Andy Daryl Strawberry's single tear at Bart's heckling. And Mattingly's sideburns.
February 19, 2012 at 6:39PM ESTBunk Oh man is this ever sweet
February 20, 2012 at 7:00PM ESTand
good lord gigantism!
Michael
February 17, 2012 at 11:20AM EST Reply to CommentI compare most other television episodes, especially comedies, to "Last Exit to Springfield". It's the densest, tightest, most wonderful 22 minutes I've ever seen. That 4th season is really something amazing. I've got a plaquemount poster of the season cover.
GimTreenfield glad someone thought the same way. "Now do Classical Gas!"
February 17, 2012 at 11:21AM ESTWebrant Last Exit to Springfield, Kogen and Wolodarsk's swan song. Dental plan. Lisa needs braces. After 499 episodes it's still the best of all time and has been voted such numerous times.
February 17, 2012 at 7:17PM ESTColin Who is it?
February 17, 2012 at 7:54PM ESTGoons.
Who?
Hired goons.
February 18, 2012 at 5:57PM ESTFran1181 Yep that is pretty classic where the dentist shows Lisa what she will look like if she doesnt get braces and it shows one of her teeth going through her head!! Hilarious!
March 5, 2012 at 12:28PM ESTGreebs
February 17, 2012 at 11:20AM EST Reply to CommentJim is right - Marge vs the Monorail FTW
GimTreenfield
February 17, 2012 at 11:20AM EST Reply to CommentLast Exit to Springfield. Incredible Homer moments (Thats-a-nice-donut), wonderful references (everything from the Beatles to the Joker to the Grinch), a nice commentary on labor and the middle class, and the best joke in the history of the Simpsons.
Found here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JcSUWP0QNeY&feature=related
Runner-up: Mr. Plow "It was a pornography store, I was buying pornography!"
albatross Better than "Use an open-faced club, a sand wedge"?
February 17, 2012 at 7:34PM ESTmonk2672 "Mmmm.... open faced club sandwich."
February 19, 2012 at 11:56AM ESTEd
February 17, 2012 at 11:21AM EST Reply to Comment"Monorail". As great as the monorail song is, as great as having Leonard Nimoy there doing nothing (or did he?), as great as everything in that episode is, nothing makes me laugh more than the Flinstones parody at the beginning.
Alan, you mentioned on Twitter that you HATE "Homer's Enemy". Care to elaborate, before we declare this a #sepinwallcrime?
Baudolino
February 17, 2012 at 11:21AM EST Reply to CommentHomie the Clown, easy.
Pizpot Gargravarr I don't think any of us expected him to say that.
February 17, 2012 at 9:27PM ESTPaul F
February 17, 2012 at 11:21AM EST Reply to CommentI'd probably go for Marge Vs. The Monorail. Nearly every scene in that episode is a classic.
"I shouldn't have stopped for that haircut."
Hanley_John Batman's a scientist!
February 17, 2012 at 11:25AM ESTJay I call the big one Bitey.
February 17, 2012 at 11:40AM ESTHans Moleman
February 17, 2012 at 11:21AM EST Reply to CommentYou Only Move Twice is a tour de force from beginning to end...still disappointed The Simpsons Movie didn't being back Hank Scorpio to be the villain as it's been reported they were considering
The hammock conversation will never not be funny
Mike This is my favorite, as well. The Canada joke is hilarious.
February 17, 2012 at 12:12PM ESTManton I DIDN'T EVEN GIVE YOU MY COAT!
February 17, 2012 at 2:20PM ESTMichael "Can't a man walk down the street without being offered a job?"
February 17, 2012 at 5:10PM ESTDoombear Aww! The Denver Broncos! You just don't understand football, Marge.
February 18, 2012 at 10:54AM ESTGil the hamock district
February 20, 2012 at 8:18PM ESTjsmoo1 "Oh my god, a guys on the floor" .... "Hank, you got any sugar?" "Sure Homer, sorry it's not in packages, you want some cream?" "Eeeeeerrr no"....."Ever see a man say goodbye to a shoe?" "Yes, once"
February 21, 2012 at 7:20PM ESTRoger you will notice we are very casual around here.....yes sir i will notice that...very casual mr.scorpion
February 22, 2012 at 11:17AM ESTPeter "Homer, which is your least favorite country: Italy or France?"
March 9, 2012 at 11:18AM EST"Ummm, France."
"Ha, no one ever says Italy."
bmfc1
February 17, 2012 at 11:21AM EST Reply to Comment"Lisa the Geek".
josh it's "Lisa The Greek", not "Lisa The Geek".
February 19, 2012 at 11:17AM ESTJustin
February 17, 2012 at 11:22AM EST Reply to CommentIf someone agrees with me that Lemon of Troy is their favorite episode, then we will truly know what it sounds like when doves cry.
sepinwall Justin, have you met Steven Day from down below?
February 17, 2012 at 11:27AM ESTanthonystrand I too am a Lemon of Troy man.
February 17, 2012 at 12:30PM ESTBadgerNoonan No one in history has ever done anything this clever.
February 17, 2012 at 5:09PM ESTBrendan Noel Step over this line and say that, I'll kick your butt...at Nintendo.
February 17, 2012 at 7:16PM ESTJohn Thomas You must be stupider than you look!
February 17, 2012 at 8:16PM ESTStupid like a fox!
Stephen Carr Was this the episode where Milhouse said: They love candy in Shelbyville THEY THINK IT's SO SWEET!
February 21, 2012 at 8:24AM ESTBostonTom This episode is a part of us all. Part of us all. PART OF US ALL.
February 21, 2012 at 10:29PM ESTmred
February 17, 2012 at 11:22AM EST Reply to CommentLisa's Rival.
A-story: Diorama-rama ("Jeremy's... iron?")
B-story: Homer's sugar pile ("Bees are on the what now?")
Pure awesomeness.
Michael The older I get, the more I think "Jeremy's Iron?" might be my favourite Simpsons joke ever
February 17, 2012 at 11:24AM ESTmred Although it is admittedly hard to argue with Marge vs the Monorail
February 17, 2012 at 11:24AM ESTGary Simpson,you diabolical...!
February 17, 2012 at 11:49AM ESTmred "Mm hmm, well that's...very good...for a first try. You know what? I have a ball. Perhaps you'd like to bounce it?"
February 17, 2012 at 12:14PM ESTLater...
"Oh! Got away from you, huh? Well, you keep at it."
Nathan Lisa's Rival is my favorite, too.
February 17, 2012 at 2:55PM ESTHomer: "In America, first you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women."
Nathan Lisa's Rival is my favorite, too.
February 17, 2012 at 2:55PM ESTHomer: "In America, first you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women."
Colin Lisa's rival has my favorite Homer impromptu rant:
February 17, 2012 at 7:57PM ESTNever, Marge. Never. I can't live the button-down life like you. I want it all: the terrifying lows, the dizzying highs, the creamy middles. Sure, I might offend a few of the bluenoses with my cocky stride and musky odors - oh, I'll never be the darling of the so-called "City Fathers" who cluck their tongues, stroke their beards, and talk about "What's to be done with this Homer Simpson?"
Ed H. Lisa's rival is the episode I use to measure all other episodes by. It's brilliant beginning to end! Great choice!
February 20, 2012 at 11:28AM ESTpeterstork
February 17, 2012 at 11:22AM EST Reply to CommentMarge vs. the Monorail. The holotype Simpsons episode that WILL. NOT. STOP. making you laugh. From the simple ("I call the big one bitey") to the offbeat ("Batman is a scientist?".) A classic song (Monorail!,) one of their best. The "Flintstones" opening ("About to hit a chestnut tree!") A stellar peak for the program.
peterstork Why not...top ten. 1.) Marge vs the Monorail 2.) Last Exit to Springfield 3.) Lemon of Troy 4.) Homer Badman 5.) Burns' Heir 6.) A Star is Burns 7.) The PTA Disbands 8.) Homer's Barbershop Quartet 9.) Radioactive Man 10.) Sideshow Bob Roberts
February 17, 2012 at 11:31AM ESTLaurie
February 17, 2012 at 11:22AM EST Reply to Comment22 Short Films About Springfield. (I even used it for a paper on Postmodernism in college!) So different, and so brilliant, and as they all are, so hilarious.
Dr Jewenstein I would pick Homer at the Bat for my favorite, but 22 Short Films has my favorite individual scene ever, when Skinner invites Superintendent Chalmers over for lunch.
February 17, 2012 at 1:08PM EST"Aurora borealis? At this time of day?! At this time of year?! At this latitude?! Localized entirely within your kitchen?!?"
"...Yes"
"May I see it?"
"...No"
Dr Jewenstein I would pick Homer at the Bat for my favorite, but 22 Short Films has my favorite individual scene ever, when Skinner invites Superintendent Chalmers over for lunch.
February 17, 2012 at 1:08PM EST"Aurora borealis? At this time of day?! At this time of year?! At this latitude?! Localized entirely within your kitchen?!?"
"...Yes"
"May I see it?"
"...No"
Matt Linn @Dr.
February 17, 2012 at 3:50PM ESTOne of my friends just got a reply from Bill Oakley on Twitter after thanking him for writing that exact scene (along with Josh Weinstein, I should note).
While I refuse to pick a favorite episode, that is hands down my favorite scene of anything ever.
Vipul As my friends and I were discussing this topic, we all started quoting the aurora borealis quote. Easily my favorite Simpsons scene
February 18, 2012 at 12:01AM ESTBrian K
February 17, 2012 at 11:23AM EST Reply to Comment"Treehouse of Horror V"
The scene where Homer sneezes and all the dinosaurs instantly die gets me every time. I'm chuckling now.
John Agreed. Although it is tough to put one of the Treehouse of Horror episodes as best ever, this one certainly is my favorite. Just three magnificent stories, highlighted by the absolutely fantastic "The Shinning". Let's also not forget that the episode ends with the inside-out Simpsons doing a musical number.
February 17, 2012 at 1:08PM ESTblockparty i think this is from treehouse of horror 3, one of my favorites although reading these responses, it is tough to identify just one episode or moment of genius.
February 17, 2012 at 9:29PM EST-i hear we are going to ape island
-yeah to catch a giant ape!
-i wish we were going to candy apple island.
-candy apple island? what do they have there?
-apes. but they aint so big.
Dr. Gross
February 17, 2012 at 11:23AM EST Reply to CommentHomer vs. the Eighteenth Amendment. It's beautifully absurd. It's premised on a historical event. Rex Banner is a great nemesis. He and Homer have an exchange while miles away from one another. And finally, and most importantly: "To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems."
booyamachine This is mine as well. Definitely the first to pop into my head.
February 17, 2012 at 11:58AM EST-I'll get you Beer Baron.
Nooooo Youuuuu Wooooon't.
-Yes I will.
D'ooooh
Merve To alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems!
February 17, 2012 at 12:04PM ESTBrendan Noel Rexy - Daisy had puppies! Love Mom
February 17, 2012 at 7:18PM ESTSean "This isn't a very happy birthday for Rex Banner..."
February 17, 2012 at 9:50PM ESTGavin Thank you!! I was beginning to think I was alone. I fall on the floor every time I see Moe crank the pet store back into his bar and see Barney still sitting on a stool ravaged by the gears.
March 6, 2012 at 2:12PM ESTTony
February 17, 2012 at 11:24AM EST Reply to CommentYou Only Move Twice.
Rocket1124
February 17, 2012 at 11:24AM EST Reply to CommentHomer vs. the 18th Amendemnt
Mark
February 17, 2012 at 11:24AM EST Reply to Comment"$pringfield," the casino episode from season 5. "I call him Gamblor, and it's time to snatch your mother from his neon claws!" "Very well. Begin the thawing of Jim Nabors." I mean, come on.
Grant Which also has my favourite line, "once something has been approved by he government, it's no longer immoral"
February 19, 2012 at 10:38PM ESTjsmoo1 "You made her cry, then I cried.....then Maggie laughed. She's such a little trooper."
February 21, 2012 at 7:30PM ESTGTPodcast
February 17, 2012 at 11:24AM EST Reply to CommentLast Exit To Springfield
Homer's Enemy as a close second
Rover537
February 17, 2012 at 11:25AM EST Reply to Comment"Itchy & Scratchy Land." Full of classic lines. "Nothing can possib-lie go wrong." "We're out of Bort license plates!" "OK, to the hole." "Smashy smashy!" "Itchy and Scratchy Land, open for business! Who are you to resist it, eh?" And so on.
Hanley_John I kicked a giant mouse in the butt! Do I have to draw you a diagram?
February 17, 2012 at 11:30AM ESTK-Pow "AHHH, SHARK BOY!" & "We have another jumper on the roof of TGI McSratchy's"
February 17, 2012 at 11:49AM ESTFuzzy Dunlop "When you get to Hell, Tell 'em Itchy sent ya!"
February 17, 2012 at 11:58AM ESTSteven Day
February 17, 2012 at 11:25AM EST Reply to CommentLemon of Troy from Season 6, Where Shelbyville steals Springfield's Lemon Tree. So many great moments, my favorite being the team-up of Martin and Nelson.
sepinwall Steven, have you met Justin from up above?
February 17, 2012 at 11:27AM ESTpeterstork Third best. (Yes, I ranked them a few years ago. I was bored.) Second is Last Exit to Springfield.
February 17, 2012 at 11:29AM ESTJoeyJoeJoeJrShabadoo You mean 'Team Discovery Channel.'
February 17, 2012 at 11:40AM ESTSCT Team Discovery Channel!
February 17, 2012 at 11:40AM EST
February 17, 2012 at 12:16PM ESTalynch Shelbyville Guy #1: "Sounds like Springfield's got a discipline problem."
February 17, 2012 at 3:23PM ESTShelbyville Guy #2: "Maybe that's why we beat them at football nearly half the time."
But Milhouse is my name... "So this is what it sounds like... when doves cry"
February 17, 2012 at 10:57PM ESTRobb
February 17, 2012 at 11:25AM EST Reply to CommentLisa's Rival. Diamrama and bent wookies. The side story of Homer stealing 'found' sugar on the side of the road and trying to sell it with bits of glass and metal. The 'Batman' beekeepers are awesome. HOmer's speech about not living the button down life is also greatness.
February 17, 2012 at 11:59AM ESTRyan "I'll never live the button down life like you Marge I want it all. The terrifying lows, the dizzying highs, the creamy middles. I may offend some of the blue noses with my cocky stride and musky odor. Sure, I'll never be the darling of the so called City Fathers who cluck their tongues stroke their beards and ask, 'What's to be done with this Homer Simpson!"
February 17, 2012 at 3:46PM ESTBest scene ever. Best Episode ever.
John I got in a fist fight once when someone disputed me that Lisa's Rival was the best episode.
February 21, 2012 at 11:03PM ESTeakawie
February 17, 2012 at 11:26AM EST Reply to CommentMarge Vs. The Monorail. Some may say it's like choosing Vanilla as your favorite ice cream flavor. I prefer to think of it as choosing Filet Mignon as my favorite cut of steak.
Rover537 Choosing Filet as your favorite cut of steak is just like choosing vanilla as your favorite ice cream. It's tender, sure, but all the real flavor is elsewhere.
February 17, 2012 at 11:32AM ESTsnapthejap
February 17, 2012 at 11:26AM EST Reply to CommentFor me, most eps from season 3-8 could be in the running for my "favorite" ep. Off the top of my head, (and I'm purposely excluding any Treehouse of Horror ep) I'll go w/ "Lemon of Troy." In that ep. there were so many misdirects & absurd moments, that even with over 20 viewings, I still laughed out loud.
--"It's as useless as that lemon-shaped rock. Wait a minute....There's a lemon behind that rock!"
sepinwall Snapthejap, have you met Steven Day and Justin above?
February 17, 2012 at 11:27AM ESTgmherwig "Sounds like Springfield's got a discipline problem."
February 17, 2012 at 12:00PM EST"Maybe that's why we beat them at football nearly half the time."
PT_Love For some reason, the quote that gets me every time from this one: "Oh, they're always eating candy in Shelbyville. They LOVE the sweet taste."
February 17, 2012 at 3:47PM EST- 1
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