[In case you've Forgotten, and as I will continue to mention each and every one of these posts that I do: This is *not* a review. Pilots change. Sometimes a lot. Often for the better. Sometimes for the worse. But they change. Actual reviews will be coming in September and perhaps October (and maybe midseason in some cases). This is, however, a brief gut reaction to not-for-air pilots.]

Show: "Charlie's Angels" (ABC)
The Pitch: It's like "Charlie's Angels" only... Yeah. Only nothing.
Quick Response: This is kinda a CW-ified "Charlie's Angels," so it's almost like "Ni3ita." But this is very straight-forward stuff in rebooting the franchise. The script by Alfred Gough and Miles Millar is brutal, all exposition and way, way, way too on-the-nose premise-establishing dialogue like "Who are you? You don't look like cops." "We're not." "We're angels." Director Marcos Siega tries a lot of flair, but when the pilot isn't in flatly choreographed action sequences, we get a ton of time with Bosley doing research on his super-powered tablet device, which is what comes from recasting Bosley as an MIT-trained hacker with seduction-ready abs. As for the Angels themselves, I kinda liked Rachael Taylor, but I also kinda liked her on "Grey's Anatomy," so I may just kinda like her. She's got the right pluck and edge for what this "Charlie's Angels" incarnation seems to be about. Annie Ilonzeh is neutral, but left me wishing they'd been able to (or interested in) woo Gugu Mbatha-Raw to just take her "Undercovers" character and try again in a different context. And Minka Kelly? I'm a big Minka Kelly fan, but she's not really believable as the street-smart tough-girl and biker-chick. I have a hard time imagining any actress weathering some of the dialogue Kelly is saddled with, but my recasting instinct already pushed Kelly out the door and replaced her with Taylor Cole, who was the only redeeming part of "The Event." There's a strong chance that now that all of the background is out of the way, "Charlie's Angels" can give up on justifying itself and can just start finding creative excuses to dress the girls in skimpy costumes on a weekly basis. But introducing such a juicy set-up shouldn't be such dull work, especially with producer Drew Barrymore presumably remembering why the first "Charlie's Angels" movie worked so relatively well.
Desire To Watch Again: Well, I wasted 43 minutes on backstory and learning each Angel, their skill-set and their individual neurosis. That wasn't pleasant. But I'll give "Charlie's Angels" at least one more week to actually entertain me.

 

Take Me To The Pilots '11: NBC's 'Grimm'
Take Me To The Pilots '11: FOX's 'New Girl'
Take Me To The Pilots '11: The CW's 'Hart of Dixie'
Take Me To The Pilots ' 11: ABC's 'Apartment 23'
Take Me To The Pilots '11: CBS' 'A Gifted Man'
All of last year's Take Me To The Pilots installments.