Crap. It’s the killer elimination results show, which will send not one but two couples home. There’s no avoiding it, of course, and it is a reality TV show competition, not a lovefest. But still, I think this episode might sting a bit.

The group dance is, in a word, meh, at least until the killer ending, which shows our dancers tumbling and robot-walking to the edge of the stage. The costumes aren’t my favorite either, though I’m sure the Bermuda shorts must have been a big hit with Nick.  

Cat Deeley promises blood on the dance floor. Thank you, Cat. I’m feeling so much better now.

Time to meet our judges. Oh yay, Debbie Reynolds is back. Such a legend, such a crappy judge. So are Mary Murphy and Nigel Lythgoe. Debbie is having a fabulous time! Someone tell her it’s an elimination show. Fabulous, not really the word of choice.

Our first three couples are on the block. Sasha and Alexander, Caitlynn and Mitchell and Missy and Wadi. First up, we have Missy and Wadi. We are reminded of Debbie wanting to take Wadi home. Funny, I had tried to block that out. They’re in the bottom three. Not a big surprise, sorry to say. Next, we have Caitlynn and Mitchell. They’re fine. Yay! Sasha and Alexander are probably safe, right? Sasha is one of the strongest dancers on the show, honestly. She and Alexander made Debbie Reynolds cry! And yes, they’re fine.

Nigel tells us the winner gets $250,000. And he mentions that the winner will become a Gatorade dance athlete. Yay? And Gatorade will be providing a sports nutritionist to the dancers. She opens up their fridges and tells them obvious things, like they shouldn’t eat ice cream and pizza with meatballs. But they should drink Gatorade brand G series fit beverage and energy bites and protein smoothie! Plug, plug, plug! The dancers are so excited to get this stuff for free! Oh, but it’s not free, my friends.

More results! Miranda and Robert are up first. I did think this was a great routine, but Miranda and Robert ended up on the bottom last week, so I don’t know. Wait, we must check in with Melanie and Marko. They’re not going anywhere, I’m sure. The second couple in danger is… neither of them. Good! They’re safe!

Next up, Iveta and Nick as well as Jordan and Tadd. I’m guessing Jordan and Tadd are in trouble, but this is just a crap shoot based on the two of them being in the bottom the first week. I thought both performances were strong, honestly. And Tadd is a revelation. God, this is a tough season. Jordan and Tadd are… safe. That means Iveta and Nick are…in the bottom three. It’s a shame, plain and simple.

Ashley and Chris are next on the block. This was a great routine. They were on the hot tamale train! They are… safe. Ryan and Ricky are next. But not really, because they’re up against Clarice and Jess. I’m guessing Clarice and Jess are in trouble. The final two dancers in danger are… Ryan and Ricky. Really? That’s a shock, honestly. I thought the sexy dance would be a bigger hit with viewers than the awkward routine Clarice and Jess put out there.

Time for a special guest act. Sigh. It’s Rage Crew’s third time on the show. I feel like I’m watching America’s Got Talent. There’s something sort of creepy about watching very young girls in bikini tops and Spandex pants grind like tiny little hookers.

Finally, it’s time for the dancers to dance for their lives. Wadi’s solo is first. And it’s not as strong as I hoped, honestly. This guy burned the floor the first week of the show, and this is good, but not awe-inspiring (despite the nice finish). I think with so many street dancers on the show this season, we need more for him to stay.

Missy is solid. And really, I think the only reason she’s here is Wadi lost some of his audience with that cha cha. But with the girls, it’s anyone’s guess.

Nick is tapping. To his credit, he makes good use of the stage. He’s fun to watch and has a sort of open charm about him. But I’m not sure if the judges will save him.

Iveta is next. Even without a partner, she’s pretty awesome. I don’t think the judges could dump a ten dance world champion this early in the competition, but who knows.

Ricky takes his shot. Amazing control and extension. He’s kick ass, honestly. But no one is really weak here. I would not want to have to judge this!

Ryan is up. She’s fierce, but her competition (right now) is Missy and Iveta. i'm not loving this. I kind of think Ryan might get the boot. She’s just not as good. And her competition is goooood.

LMFAO performs with Quest Crew. Hey, dance music! There’s a guy with a box on his head! Someone has a fog machine! It’s dumb, fun dance music, and at this point in the show, it’s absolutely perfect. We need an upbeat moment. I’m starting to get depressed, honestly.  

Time to send two girls home. Nigel says it’s unanimous. Missy is asked to step forward. Nigel says there’s nothing to fault in her dancing. Wow, that’s faint praise, Nigel. Nigel tells Iveta he will always remember her routine with Pasha and she deserves to be here. That's promising, but Nigel tends to say good things before he kicks you out. Nigel says Ryan’s solo wasn’t her best. And she can do better.

The girl who stays on the show is… Ryan. Really? Wow, would not have guessed that. I guess the judges think she has the potential to do more – the judges love any opportunity to see a dancer “blossom” over the course of the show. But did they really think Iveta and Missy had gone as far as they could go? I didn’t think Ryan was even the strongest solo of the girls. I like Ryan, but I’m not thrilled with this decision.

Iveta takes it on the chin. Missy cries and babbles a little. Poor thing. She did leave it all on the floor, and so did Iveta. They’re both so good. This sucks.

Next up, the guys. Nigel tells Wadi that he hasn’t had time to show what he can do. Nigel tells Nick that he’s going to be a star. Nigel tells Ricky he’s never seen him dance better than his solo. And Ricky is going to stay on the show. Whoa! Wadi is proud of himself and he’s not going to cry. Nick gets weepy. I see why the judges kept Ricky – that was a hell of a solo – but I’m still sad to see Nick (and even Wadi) get the boot. Yeah, Thursday nights do suck on "SYTYCD," to paraphrase Cat Deeley.

Did you think the four ousted dancers deserved to go? Who did you vote for? And are you competing in the “SYTYCD” HitFix Fantasy League?