Welcome to The Morning Read.

Of course Johnny Depp wants to remake "The Thin Man".  He'll get to play another comic lead who spends an entire movie drunk.  It's like Jack Sparrow in a tuxedo, for god's sake.  And since he and Rob Marshall are evidently getting along like a house on fire on "Pirates Of The Caribbean: On Stranger Tides" right now, I'd say if Depp really wants him to direct this remake, he will.  Intense jealousy barely begins to describe what I feel towards anyone lucky enough to be involved in this. 

I have a love of the "Thin Man" films, even the weakest of them, that I have for very few other films.  I love Nick and Nora Charles.  Hell, if you go to my Twitter page, my background since day one has been the two or them and Asta, their dog.  There is no greater screen couple, and as much as Depp feels like an easy slam-dunk as Nick Charles, the real key is finding a Nora Charles who gives as good as she gets, and who can be a completely game partner for him.  No easy feat.  This one's still an idea in a movie star's head, an itch he wants scratched, and there's no writer yet, much less a script, so for now, it's an interesting hypothetical.

I can't believe they caught the kid who threatened to kill Matt Stone and Trey Parker over their depiction of the prophet Muhammad on "South Park."  That's sort of amazing.  Anonymity really isn't the shield that people think it is.

Speaking of which, Gene Simmons has evidently drawn the ire of Anonymous, the online group that's been pounding Scientology in the face for the last few years.  I'd like to make it clear that I think Anonymous is super-cool and I want no problems with them.  Ever.  Which is why I'm sort of intrigued to see someone confront them head on and even issue some threats right back in their direction.  Legion versus the Demon?  Just make sure I've got a seat so I can watch the fireworks.

I'm totally unfamiliar with the site, but everyone seems to take it as gospel that Showbiz Spy's Bruce Willis quotes are correct.  If they are, Willis seems to think two more "Die Hard" films would be a good idea.  I'm really not sure I agree.

This is on my desk right now, just waiting for the right three-hour window to open.  I'm so excited.  I've let almost a decade go since my last viewing of this masterpiece, and I will be sharing my impressions on this disc as soon as possible.  In the meantime, this is a great review that just makes me eager to see it.

Nice.  You never need to speak with actual words again.

Tis the season for horror movie lists all over the internet, but few of them have the credibility that this one does, because when Zack and Lars start talking about horror and death and blood and gore, you would do well to pay attention.

Paul Rust is currently working on the new Pee-Wee Herman movie as a writer, and it appears he's also been raiding Prince's closet.

This disturbs me enormously.  And I want it.

I've actually done one of these "naked" airport scans, and I can tell you that they're really nothing to worry about.  Sure, I heard a wave of derisive laughter from a nearby room, but I'm sure that had nothing to do with me.  This story, though, is a grim reminder of just how little value our "rights" seem to have these days.  Common sense has to play some part in the way we do things… right?

Well-done, New Zealand Actors Equity.  I hope you're happy.  I know dozens of people personally and know of hundreds more besides who can now kiss goodbye something that they've spent years working towards.  If you think this is a game of chicken, you're wrong.  "The Hobbit" will leave New Zealand.  You will lose those jobs.  But more than that, you will have sent the message to the world that New Zealand is not the home for filmmaking it's become in the last decade.  Is that really what you want?  Who are you serving in the long run?  I am not a Guild man… I've had too many experiences watching my own WGA put the interests of others ahead of the interests of its members… and watching this unfold from a distance, I'm amazed that a group could be this short-sighted and selfish.  What a shame.

Todd Gilchrist.  Francis Ford Coppola.  One damn fine interview.

If you watch only one clip today from the upcoming Warner Archive release of "Legends Of The Superheroes," let it be this one.  Good god, that's great.

This is shocking news if you're a "Star Wars" nerd.  If you're not, then I'm guessing that was the single most boring link I've ever posted here.

I do not own "Fallout: New Vegas".  I won't buy it.  I shouldn't.  I can't.  If I do, you will never see me or hear of me again, because "Fallout 3" was a total time vacuum.  All I can afford to hand over to the new game is the 20 minutes it takes to watch the following video, which is the first 20 minutes of the game.



Ohhhhh, maybe I shouldn't have watched that.  Best Buy is only three minutes from here.  Hmmmmmm.

Tim from Tim and Eric posted a Twitter link to a full set of photos that people took with Summer Glau at DragonCon, and it is hypnotic.  I'll say this… Glau is the very definition of "good sport" here.

Okay, there's a teaser trailer for "Cars 2" online today, as well as some new concept art, and I have to say… I don't get it.  Are there people in the world of "Cars"?  Because if not, the entire thing makes no sense to me, and if not, why the hell are there buildings and other things that only people would use?  Who builds the cars?  Why are they built as cars, with passenger space included?  I know I'm not supposed to ask the questions, but Pixar's so good at story logic that it just seems glaringly bizarre to me.  I know this is one of the most commercial properties they've ever created.  I have enough toys spun off from the first film here in the house to know just how firm a hold "Cars" has on the imaginations of its young fans.  But if there's any one Pixar film (and now franchise) that I truly don't understand, it's this one.  Check out the trailer here…



… and the concept art here.

I'll be at the "Paranormal Activity 2" screening in LA tonight at midnight, and it looks like I'll be joined by several of you as well.  The ghost stories they sent in were so good that I don't want to just excerpt them, so tomorrow night, I'll be posting them here in their own stand-alone piece.  Thanks for entering, though, and I'll be notifying the winners in the next hour so they can get ready for tonight's screening.

And finally, these are ridiculous.  Neat, but ridiculous.

The Morning Read appears here every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.  Except when it doesn't.

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