Welcome to The Morning Read.

Isn't it supposed to get quiet over a holiday weekend?  If that's true, then why do I have a giant overstuffed Morning Read for you today, and why is everyone else online working so damn hard right now?  I have turkey sandwiches to eat, people! They're not going to eat themselves!  In the spirit of the season, some of these are brand new links, and some are leftovers I'm just clearing out.  Seems appropriate, eh?

I'm hearing some pretty amazing buzz from this week's Guild screening of "Sherlock Holmes," and I have a feeling all the naysayers are going to find themselves part of a very small club when audiences get a look at the film next month.  I'm dying to take a look myself, and I hope it happens sooner rather than later.  To be fair, our own Greg Ellwood tells me that the HFPA, the voting body behind the Golden Globes, hated the film, but I'd trust my sources and their taste over anything the HFPA thinks any day of the week.  It sounds to me like "Sherlock" might just turn out to be the franchise-started Warner Bros. is praying for.

It's always interesting when a film goes from hypothetical to actual, and I guess I missed that moment for the third "Narnia" film.  Last I heard, the film was still a "maybe," but Coming Soon just debuted a number of stills from the film, including looks at Lucy Pensevie, Prince Caspian and Edmund reunited, and the helm of the ship.  One image is included here at the top of the story, and you can find the rest of them at Coming Soon. 

Did you know the Kids In The Hall are working together again?  Did you know they're making a full-blown mini-series that they say is inspired by "The League Of Gentlemen"?  Do you have any idea how cool that is?  There's a teaser trailer online now, and it fills me with sinister glee. 

Another thing that gives me great pleasure is Tim Heidecker's song for "Old Dogs."  Tim, if you're not familiar with his work, is one half of "Tim & Eric's Awesome Show! Great Job!", which is one of the most consistently diseased pieces of comedy in any media right now.  I wish this had been the opening titles theme song for "Old Dogs," because it could have only helped. 

I was vaguely aware of just how deranged the "Twilight" series is by the fourth book, but I didn't read them, so I didn't know all the specifics.  After reading Devin's latest piece at CHUD, I am in complete agreement with him.  I pray that "Eclipse" is a monster hit as well so that one day soon, I can sit in a theater and bask in every single second of the brain-damaged glory of "Breaking Dawn."

io9, by the way, deserves a special holiday shout-out for cracking this one:

 

 

RT @robhuebel:  Calling today "black friday" sounds racist. Dreaming of a "white Christmas" also hurtful. And a "Happy Jew Year" is inexcusable.

If it's Thanksgiving week, that means it's time for Quint's giant annual holiday gift-giving guide over at Ain't It Cool, and sure enough, part one is up and packed with all sorts of greatness.  If you are reading this and plan to send me various examples of amazing things off the list, just e-mail me and I'll send you the shipping address.  That $700 Kubrick Napoleon book would make a lovely addition to my office.  Ahem. 

On that list is the latest album from Patton Oswalt, who wants to share a little holiday cheer with you:

 

 

And also on that list is the latest from Louis CK, who isn't doing so well these days:

 

 

All new parents can sympathize with the horribly dark humor of Larry Doyle's new story "Whacking The Baby" over at the great Popcorn Fiction. 

Obviously, that's a joke, but it's no joke the way domestic violence resonates through someone's entire life. Take Patrick Stewart, for example.  He wrote a moving piece today about his own experiences for The Guardian, and it's worth a read. 

I can admit I have an addiction.  That doesn't mean I can do anything about it.  Hence, today's fix of "Avatar" hype:

 

 

I love that scene, and I find I'm almost as interested in the eventual behind-the-scenes stuff on the BluRay as I am in the film itself at this point. 

Stephen King's considering a sequel to The Shining?  Really?  Count me in.  I still think it's one of his very best books, and I like the idea of catching up with Danny Torrence at 40.  I don't even need a bad guy in the book... I'm just curious to see how a character like that, after what he's been through, moves forward as an adult.  I just hope King's not going to use the book to grind his ridiculous axe with the Kubrick movie, because as much as I love King, he's wrong about that one.  Wrong, wrong, wrong.

And speaking of Kubrick, I love that his fans are as obsessive as he was

Luc Besson's got a film coming out next year, and even if I said nothing else besides that, you should be excited.  But now /film has some stills from the movie, which is said to be a pulpy adventure film a la "Indiana Jones," but starring a female character played by Louise Bourgoin.  So far, I love what I'm seeing about this film, and it's safe to say "Les Adventures Extrodinaire d'Adele Blanc-Sec" is on the short list of films I'm itching to see in 2010.

Brian Salisbury put up an exceptional piece about "Turkey Shoot," a deliciously vile Brian Trenchard-Smith exploitation film from Australia, and as you're working on your leftovers, give it a read.  And then head over to where you can now see a list of every film in "Not Quite Hollywood," that amazing Ozploitation documentary I continually plug here on the site, as well as where you can find the movies for yourself.  What a great resource, and I hope that guy keeps it current, or that someone would do the same but for region one viewers.

According to Moviehole, Ruben Fleischer wants to make "Zombieland 2" in 3D.  Sounds cool, but don't tell Roger Ebert.  Boy, he hates 3D.  We've all got our peeves, I suppose.  Every film critic loves to start a conversation, especially if it's over something they passionately believe while knowing full well that others disagree.  I respect that Mike D'Angelo is willing to step up and articulately explain why Cuaron bugs the crap out of him in "Children of Men," especially when his comments section gets as heated as it does.

Speaking of Rogert Ebert, he's stayed very politically quiet about what's happened to the show he and Gene Siskel built, and I guess he finally reached a point where all that quiet took its toll, because this week, he opened up for the first time.  It's good stuff, but never as blisteringly angry as it could (and probably should) be.  Roger's a class act, and right now, if you're not following him on Twitter or reading his journal online, you're missing some of the loosest, silliest, most fun Ebert of his entire career.  I'm sorry he's had the rough times he has recently with his health, but the man's an inspiration in terms of how he handles it all.  It must be bittersweet for him to unearth some old Siskel & Ebert material, but I love that he shares whatever he finds, like this...

 

 

... or this archive of early '80s episodes he found.  Amazing.  Has it really been that long?

The full text of the proposed William Shatner scene in the JJ Abrams "Star Trek" has found its way online, and for the first time, I'm sad it didn't happen.  I really like the way it reads

And finally, because you can never see it enough times, I leave you with the single most joyous viral video of the month:

 

 

"Dada?"  Indeed. 

I've got one screening over the weekend, although I can't say what I'm seeing...

 

The official final poster for Peter Jackson's 'The Lovely Bones'

 

... and then I'm back on Monday with a review of "Invictus," a new Morning Read, and much much more. See you guys then.

The Morning Read appears here every day, Monday through Friday.  Except when it doesn't.

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