As Tom immediately informs us, this is the first ever results show featuring a dance-off.  But first some award winning performers! This is my first Dancing With The Stars results show (as I noted in an earlier blog, I've never seen the show prior to this season), and I went into it questioning how they could stretch a dance off to a full hour of programming (let alone the hour "recap" episode before it starts). Now I have my answer: Big Bad Voodoo Daddy, Jewel, and various other poorly produced forms of filler.

Once Big Bad Voodoo Daddy finishes their performance and I look back up from my laptop, we get an update on the condition of contestant Steve-O - who did not dance last night.  He is present at the show, at explains that a risky, last-minute change in dance routine (an added backflip) landed him on a stretcher. He is prepared to do a "dance off," which could very well be the case as Tom relays the order of the judge's placement of the contestants:  Steve & Karina and Steve-O & Lacey are the judge's bottom two.

[More after the jump]

We learn in regard to the dance off that all of the performers have prepared a potential number (a rehash of one of their prior two performances) in case they are in the bottom two, once phoned-in votes are counted with the judge's. The judge's scores from the previous dances will no longer count, and their scores from the dance-off will be added to both weeks of phone voting (does that make sense to you? I had to look up an explanation on abc.com to be sure I knew what I was talking about).

The first eight couples to escape the dance off? In no particular order: Lawrence & Edyta, Shawn & Mark, Chuck & Julianne,  David & Kim, Denise & Max, Melissa & Tony, Lil' Kim & Derek (phew!), and Gilles & Cheryl.

So it appears the bottom five coincide with the judge's choices: Holly & Dmitry, Belinda & Jonathan, Ty & Chelsie, Steve-0 & Lacey and Steve & Karina.

Now we wait through more filler. There's some horrific "celebrity survival guide" featuring various clips from previous segments hosted by some douchebag named Cameron, and a Busby Berkeley inspired dance number (brought to you by Macy's!). Jesus. Then after a whole commercial break, its Jewel, fractured tibias and all, singing "Somewhere Over The Rainbow," while Dmitry (thankfully shirtless) and Chelsie interpret it. They get a standing ovation. Yes folks, this is the second highest rated show in the United States.

Finally, we're gonna find out who is in the dance-off. After what seemed like an hour of suspense building, we're told Holly & Dmitry, Ty & Chelsie and pity-vote factored Steve-O & Lacey are all safe.  So that means it's a computer nerd vs. a washed up 80s pop singer dancing off to avoid elimination.

On to the dance-offs:

Belinda & Jonathan

Reattempting the salsa that Belinda was severely criticized for last night (no hip action!), the pair seem to find some mild improvement regarding those hips, but are still overall quite sloppy, and Belinda struggles to look particularly passionate. The judges agree.  They actually give them a slightly lower score (17) than they got last night.  Belinda looks horribly embarrassed, as she should be. 

Steve & Karina

Injured foot notwithstanding, the ever-spirited Steve gives 'er for his re-do of the quick step that earned him 17 points last night. He ends it out of breath and sweating, and the crowd leaps to their feet. He still can't quite dance, but he's hard not to love.  I suspect the phone voters might feel the same.  The judges look for what good they can in it, and give him 17, the same score he got last night.


And the first couple to uh, go go... Belinda & Jonathan. Steve's charms won him a second chance. Belinda's hips send  her back to obscurity.

See you next week...